Losing a loved one (2 Viewers)

[townie]

Who here has lost some1 close to them, whether a friend, family member, pet, girlfriend/boyfriend?

how r u coping/how did u cope? what reminds u of them?

feel free to open up, if u want 2

i lost one of my best friends in year 10..he was 15. i still find it hard, but i cope by seeking comfort in my other friends (like ur_inner_child), the stupidest things remind me of him, a joke, a place, just somebody acting like him, also whenever i see his brothers, like i did today.

just thought i'd share, ask u 2 do the same

(btw, i think this thread DOES belong in L&R as it's losing a LOVED one who u had a RELATIONSHIP with)

 

[jumb]

The best thing is to talk about it as much as possible.

 

[Shuter]

I basically blocked it out for 7 years, then some other events combined with it sort of triggered something which put me in depression for a bit. Now I'm fine.

 

[townie]

The best thing is to talk about it as much as possible.

yeah, i totally agree with that, but guys find it harder to talk about things, that what i have found difficult, i've had 2 rely a lot on my female friends to talk, or wait till my guy friends r drunk...it was in the paper a few days ago actually that boys do wanna talk, but fear doing so...
just a brief OT there

 

[jumb]

yeah, i totally agree with that, but guys find it harder to talk about things, that what i have found difficult, i've had 2 rely a lot on my female friends to talk, or wait till my guy friends r drunk...it was in the paper a few days ago actually that boys do wanna talk, but fear doing so...
just a brief OT there

You shouldnt be self concious about talking about stuff like that. And if you are, talk to other people. Talk about it on the internet, or to some random stranger. Or even call kids helpline if you really need someone to talk to.

 

[mmm_sofay]

cry. just cry your heart out. cry as much you need be, and then cry some more.
and just talk about it. talk about the person. talk about the relationship you had with the person.
cry some more.
think of all the great times you had with that person. reminise on everything, and if it makes you sad and you need to cry, just cry.

when i was three, one of my friends died. the last time i saw him alive, we were chucking rocks at each other. i dont remember it happening (the rock chucking) but i remember my mum telling me. about two months ago, i just thought of it and started crying, but my mum told me that his mum didnt blame me for anything. he died in a car accident, he was the only one in the car with three other occupants to die. but his mum didnt blame me for his death coz i was chucking rocks at him, coz it was a ffew days after the rock chucking incident that he died.
and because i was too young to really understand anything that was happening, i cry about it now.

 

[KeypadSDM]

My best friend died while I was in year 7, he died on his sister's 21st birthday. I found that plain old crying, no matter where public private whatever helped me, especially when there was someone there to comfort me.

Ironically, I now feel somewhat emotionally decrepit. But I can still empathise with people going through tough situations. Man, I should have been a doctor.

 

[azzie]

my cousin was 15 when he was shot and i was just 4. he was like the coolest older cousin ever, he would always take me places when the adults were too busy and he was a really nice guy.
war fucking sucks.
i didnt even know how i reacted to hearing that he was dead.... i completley blocked it out of my memory. even though i remember heaps of stuff from that time in my life, i cant remember anything about his death.

 

[go_elizabeth]

one of my friends mum's died. an he didnt talk about it. it was about 2 weeks befor the hsc started and he just blocked it out. i think he put off the grieving and focused on a good mark... and he still hasnt got round to it, i dont kow if e ever will cos he kinda just closed that part of him up. sadly.

when i lost one of my friends last year, i found the best ting to do was to talk to ppl, and wrtie it all down. taking up a sport too. focus ur energy on other things.

 

[lukebennett]

my cat disappeared randomnly. i miss my cat. my loopy mother called he "little precious". i think she has a gollum complex or something hehehehe

i was quite upset for a while cause we knew she was dead

 

[soha]

my friend died in year 5..he sat next to me in class
and was hit by a bus riding his bike to skool one morning
that day when we found out we cried like there wa sno tomorrow
now i think back to that day..and i laugh
(not coz he died or anything)

in yr 5 we had an assembly 4 him
i had to write a poem and present it...it goes sumfing like this

on the 25th of june 1997
isaac died and now hes lying up in heaven
looking down at us with a cheeky grin
as i wipe my tear and put the tisue in the bin
for he died i dont know why
just think of him as in a deep sleep
for now i must go and weep

yeah..thats my story..and my tacky poem..but it was special back then..

 

[Not-That-Bright]

i got teary eyed hearing ur story and poem, so i'm sure it did wonders on the parents.

 

[joujou_84]

my cousin died two yrs ago...he finished his HSC and went to back to switzerland for a holiday and he died in his sleep.....they didnt know why..........we were really close.....

edit: as for dealing with it.........i dont........i just cry when i remember him....it so much harder when the person is young and has his whole life ahead of him....looking at P-plates remind me of him, the footy show reminds me of him.....so many things.......

 

[soha]

yeah..the worst part in presenting the poem on assembly
was evertime i looked at the audience i saw his mum and sister

 

[joujou_84]

yeah..the worst part in presenting the poem on assembly
was evertime i looked at the audience i saw his mum and sister

its so hard on the family......im sure they really appreciated all ur efforts..

 

[Not-That-Bright]

Such an upsetting topic...
I dunno how i'm going to cope with the death of my parents, or of a close friend, i just can't imagine life without some people so i dunno how people cope.

 

[soha]

oh i can cope..like ive experienced so many deaths during my lifetime of people that are close to me
and at one stage my mum was really sick and could have died so i got ready to face it if she did
and she didnt thankfully but i think i will be o.k...when they do

 

[Not-That-Bright]

Yea my dad had this disease that like makes u heaps weak.. i think it's called gullian beret syndrome or something.
I didn't kno at the time but there's a huge death rate for that disease... but yea i didn't really kno so i never had to cope.

 

[joujou_84]

oh i can cope..like ive experienced so many deaths during my lifetime of people that are close to me
and at one stage my mum was really sick and could have died so i got ready to face it if she did
and she didnt thankfully but i think i will be o.k...when they do

i wish i could be strong like that...i dont cope well with death or sickness......evn hearing someone died on the news makes me cry for days........

 

[soha]

well..we all going to die
no one lives forever
so we gonna have to start facing reality and prepare ourselves for when people do die

oh and the best thing is..do not fear death