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Opinions/Help with eng speech (discovery) (1 Viewer)

nomchomchikapompom

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question:
Discovery brings change.
How have the set text and texts of your own choosing explored the nature of changes that result from a discovery ?
set text: rainbow's end
related texts: suicide in the trenches (poem) and the light and the little girl (short movie)

just want to know if it's good and how can I make the intro more interesting?

Discoveries as a whole can be confronting and provocative where this process of discovering leads to change.They challenge our perceptions when viewed from different perspectives and makes individuals to change, reflect and see the world differently. These varying types of discovery are seen and explored in the Jane Harrison’s play ‘Rainbow’s end’ and also my other 2 related texts; Seigfried Sassoon’s poem ‘Suicide in the trenches’ and short movie ‘The light and the little girl’ by Vivi Ann Yee.

Discoveries can lead to the destruction of long held generalisations and perceptions and change them. This is done so in “rainbow’s end”
The imperative language used in the quote “The white people too- they need to be educated about us, and our ways.” the inclusive pronouns “us” and “our” used by Gladys, an Aboriginal indicates that she is talking about the wider Aboriginal community. That she demands White Australians who at that time made up majority of society to learn about who Aboriginals really are, their lifestyles and history, not the generalisations withheld about them. This quote reveals that society has many misinformed perceptions about Aboriginals that had caused Gladys to retaliate so angrily.

Gladys shows that Aboriginals can be self-educated and represents them favourably in society through radio voice over when she answers “…a black eye” at the same time as the ‘white’ announcer by allowing an Aboriginal to answer in sync with the white announcer emphasises these two contrasting humans that society deems as so different and unalike when really they both have the ability to give the same educated answer.
This provocative discovery confronts the society’s perceptions and generalisations against Aboriginals to change, they come to realise that Aboriginals aren’t indifferent to whites and that those previous generalisations were incorrect.

Similarly our opinions are also challenged, confronted and changed in “suicide in the trenches” we discover the realities of war. The cumulation of the adjectives, “crumps and lice and lack of rum” is a metaphor. ‘Crumps’ symbolise the loudness of war and absence of peace. Lice can be interpreted as an unhygienic environment of war and lack of rum symbolises the lack of pleasure and comfort which rum could’ve provided to the depressed soldiers. This metaphor confronts the audience to discover the savage conditions that men face in a battlefield.
The perception of entering war is thought to be highly valued and honoured,a place where these soldiers will be treated with respect, but the realisation of this decision is quickly regretted through the realties and hardships that are faced. The declarative statement “He put a bullet through his brain” emphasises the harsh truth of the effects of war, that it is such a in hostile environment that the only way out was by death.

The pitiful tone in the declamatory statement “no one spoke of him again” shows not only the governments attempts at ignoring the realities of war but also the unsympathetic, overlooked attitudes towards these soldiers, the audience discover the treatment these supposedly heroic soldiers face. Thus, confronting and provocative discoveries can be clearly seen through the ‘Suicide in the trenches’ by the sudden confronting realisation of the devastating realties of war and the epiphany of provocation from readers.
However discoveries not only cause the audience’s perceptions and values to change but those of the characters themselves as well as found.

In the Light and The tittle Girl, the girl finds herself in a journey of discovery that is confronting and provocative as it can teach both the girl and us life lessons that can change and correct our previous misinformed values.
The median shot of her frontal view shows her laying on the ground with her arms out trying to preserve the light beaming into her hands, she closes her hands with the nativity that when she pulls her closed hands away from the light, the light will be captured and claimed by her. However this is not the case as when she pulls her hands away she faces her second major discovery, that she cannot obtain the light.

The scene towards the end of the movie juxtaposes with that of the beginning of the short movie where she was so eager and excited to observe the light. There’s a long shot of her walking to the light again accept this time her facial expression has become dull and background music contrasts with the prior scene has died down and she shows no interest in touching the light this time. These contrasting efforts show that her journey of discovery has changed her perception that everything can be obtained.

Her realisation that she cannot conserve the light is a confrontative discovery she has faced that leads her to change her but also through her discovery the audience’s previous belief that we are able obtain the un-obtainable.


Thus, the conclusion that confrontative and provocative discoveries persuade the audience and the characters to change their perceptions and previously held assumptions can be made. These discoveries result in change, such as in “Rainbow’s end” where Gladys is able to break generalisations about Aboriginals, “Suicide in the trenches” where Sassoon confronted the oblivious audience of the harsh realities of war and also in “the light and the little girl” where the girl’s and the audiences values are reevaluated.

 
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You have a very good points and structure. However, it's more of an essay than speech.
This is where you should include rhetorical devices- rhetorical questions, repetition, etc
btw, what's the time limit?
 

BLIT2014

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I think you need more rhetorical devices in your speech.
 

nomchomchikapompom

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no, thanks a lot for the feedback! I really needed someone to point out my weak point :) I'm just really bad at speeches in general and english isn't really my favourite subject but again thanks for the feedback, it was really helpful :)
 

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