Simpsons Quotes thread (2 Viewers)

[notaaron]

homer talking to mr burns: "it takes a lot to impress me mr burns"
*drives past a blue car*
homer: "WOW A blue car!!!"

Doesnt bart say that?

 

[runtlocks]

George Meyer: Excuse me, but "proactive" and "paradigm"? Aren't these just buzzwords that dumb people use to sound important? [backpedaling] Not that I'm accusing you of anything like that. [pause] I'm fired, aren't I?

Meyers: Oh, yes.

You mean Cerberus?

 

[scarybunny]

Doesnt bart say that?

No.

 

[d91sh]

Grandpa simpson: latex condom... boy i'd like to live in one of those:rofl:

Lisa: julio i love your new blond hair
Julio: oh my god lisa if i was an 8 year old straight boy i would so be holding your hand right now

 

[walrusbear]

bart: why does danger dog mean more to me than school and church?
cartoonist: because those things suck

 

[^CoSMic DoRiS^^]

what's the name of that enviro-freak kid that lisa falls in love with in the episode with the tree (yes very specific I know). He makes me lol.

"I'm a level five vegan. I don't eat anything that casts a shadow"

(Lisa says she has a compost heap at home)

"Only at home?! You don't pocket mulch?!" (pulling out a handful of decomposing shit)

lol hippies.

 

[draliz]

I love this one, it cracks me up every time!

*Homer spray paints "I am Homer Simpson" on the wall of Mr Burns' office*

*Mr Burns walks in* "Who the devil are you?"

*Homer yells and lurges at him*

:rofl:

 

[walrusbear]

Homer: Well, what did everybody think?
Ned: Homer, I can honestly say that's the best episode of "Impy & Chimpy" i've ever seen!
Carl: Yeah, you should be very proud, Homer, you uh... got a beautiful home here.

 

[bawd]

Dr. Nick: "Hi, Everybody!"

 

[Omium]

lol, one of the funniest quotes (though you need to be actually viewing the scene for it to be funny :S.

Ned : Don't worry homer, we've all had our brushes with the Law.
(Flash back)

Police Officer knocks on door: Are you Ed Flanders?
Ned : Nope
Police officer: My mistake

 

[CurlyRuby]

Dammit someone beat me to the communist quote

 

[runtlocks]

Bart: Milhouse...Milhouse! You win. I want this nightmare to end!
Robot: Leave this place. You are in great danger.
Bart: Where's Milhouse?
Robot: The one you call Milhouse is gone.
[takes helmet off]
Man: He went to his grandma's place while we're spraying for potato bugs.
Bart: Oh. When Milhouse left, did you notice if he was carrying a piece of paper?
Man: Oh, yeah. You don't forget a thing like that.

 

[walrusbear]

BUMP

the real thread fell off the radar

Bart: Take him away, boys.
Wiggum: Hey, I'm the Police Chief here. Bake him away, toys.
Lou: What was that, chief?
Wiggum: Do what the kid says.

 

[chicky_pie]

just a few other quotes i love


Scully: Homer, we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand?
Homer: Yes. (lie dectector blows up)


Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup?
Marge: Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa.
Lisa: Bart, tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product.
Bart: You dunkin' your sausages in that syrup homeboy?
Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning.
Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart.
Homer: Bart, thank your mother for pointing that out.
Marge: Homer, you're not not-talking to me and secondly I heard what you said.
Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case.
Bart: Uhhh, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to.
Homer: Bart, go to your room.


Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.

lol

 

[Mozza91]

Get off the stage sweetheart

 

[inter108]

Doh'

 

[spence]

Mr. Burns: Quick Smithers. Bring the mind erasing device!

Smithers: You mean the revolver, sir?

Mr. Burns: Precisely.

Gentlemen, you've both worked very hard. And in a way, you're both winners. But in another, more accurate way, Barney is the winner.

Here are your messages: ‘You have thirty minutes to move your car.’ ‘You have ten minutes.’ ‘Your car has been impounded.’ ‘Your car has been crushed into a cube.’ ‘You have thirty minutes to move your cube.’

I may occasionally kill out of anger; or to illustrate a point, but I'm no Grim Reaper!

Oh my God! Someone's trying to kill me! Oh wait, it's for Bart.

Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true.

 

[Kiim2507]

Ralph: This is my swing set. This is my sandbox. I'm not allowed to go in the deep end. (points to large rock): That's where I saw the leprechaun!
Bart (skeptically): Right, a leprechaun.
Ralph: He told me to burn things.
Bart (warily): Uh-huh...

 

[z600]

Ned: It feels like I am wearing nothing at all "shakes butt"
Homer: DAMN sexy flanders

Homer: I am so smart S M A T I mean S M A R T

 

[Omie Jay]

Homer: I am so smart S M A T I mean S M A R T

Doesnt he say "S-M-R-T, i mean S-M-A-R-T"?