z600
Sigh.....
- Joined
- Feb 18, 2006
- Messages
- 821
- Gender
- Male
- HSC
- 2008
1. The US has made a new weapon that destroys people but keeps the building standing. Its called the stock market.
- Jay Leno
2. Do you have any idea how cheap stocks are? Wall Street is now being called Wal Mart Street.
- Jay Leno
3. The difference between a pigeon and a London investment banker. The pigeon can still make a deposit on a BMW.
4. What's the difference between a guy who lost everything in Las Vegas and an investment banker? A tie!
5. The problem with investment bank balance sheet is that on the left side nothing's right and on the right side nothing's left.
6. I want to warn people from Nigeria who might be watching our show ... if you get any emails from Washington asking for money, it's a scam. Don't fall for it.
- Jay Leno
7. Bush was asked about the credit crunch. He said it was his favourite candy bar.
- Jay Leno
8. The rescue bill was about 450 pages. President Bush's copy is even thicker. They had to include pictures.
- Jay Leno
9. President Bush's response was to meet some small business owners in San Antonio last week. The small business owners are General Motors, General Electric and Century 21..
- Jay Leno
10. What worries me most about the credit crunch is that if one of my cheques is returned stamped 'insufficient funds', I won't know whether that refers to mine or the bank's.
- Jay Leno
2. Do you have any idea how cheap stocks are? Wall Street is now being called Wal Mart Street.
- Jay Leno
3. The difference between a pigeon and a London investment banker. The pigeon can still make a deposit on a BMW.
4. What's the difference between a guy who lost everything in Las Vegas and an investment banker? A tie!
5. The problem with investment bank balance sheet is that on the left side nothing's right and on the right side nothing's left.
6. I want to warn people from Nigeria who might be watching our show ... if you get any emails from Washington asking for money, it's a scam. Don't fall for it.
- Jay Leno
7. Bush was asked about the credit crunch. He said it was his favourite candy bar.
- Jay Leno
8. The rescue bill was about 450 pages. President Bush's copy is even thicker. They had to include pictures.
- Jay Leno
9. President Bush's response was to meet some small business owners in San Antonio last week. The small business owners are General Motors, General Electric and Century 21..
- Jay Leno
10. What worries me most about the credit crunch is that if one of my cheques is returned stamped 'insufficient funds', I won't know whether that refers to mine or the bank's.
Letterman does pretty much the same sort of jokes. Speaking of which, he starts in an hour... 