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Issues with the world of chocolate. (1 Viewer)

Optimus Prime

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Despite what companies like Cadbury lead the common folk to believe, a world where all matter is chocolate is not scientifically sound nor, as you will see, a desirable habitat to live. Although one may argue that different types of matter may be substituted by different types and flavours of chocolate, most chocolate is made up of the same basic ingredients -- fermented coco beans, sugar, milk and so on. Each of these is made up of a small handful of basic molecules. In a world of chocolate, our universe would not consist of 118 elements, it would only contain a small few. I would imagine basic elements like hydrogen, carbon, oxygen and so on. This I imagine would have a huge impact on the forming of the planets themselves, let alone the stars. But let's put that aside and assume that planet earth somehow formed in the universe and existed as it does now.

In a world made of chocolate, life as we know it would be impossible. Unfortunately melted chocolate is not an adequate substitute for blood nor can chocolate replace the intricacies of DNA, cells and all the microscopic nuances that make life possible. Chocolate does not conduct electricity so the brain would be completely inoperable. Chocolate doesn't have the strength of bones, nor the 'stretchiness' of muscles. In fact it holds barely any of the properties required for the human body to function. A body made of chocolate simply would not work. But let's assume it would.

Buildings and structures would not be able to sustain themselves under the sunlight. Chocolate has a very low melting point so unless the entire earth had a much colder climate than it does now, a civilisation would be impossible. Bridges would melt in the heat and become one with the chocolatey rivers flowing beneath them. Heat engines (ie car motors) would also be inoperable because chocolate is not a combustible fuel.

All this aside, a human cannot survive on a sole diet of chocolate. And your chocolate teeth would rot. That is all I have to say. Perhaps Cadbury should have considered just what they were doing when they envisaged a world made of their chocolate, it wouldn't be happy or fun at all.
 

mirakon

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who gives a shit, it'll taste good and that's all that matters.

Screw obesity and health i wanna eat unhealthy tasty food.
 

bitumen

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this would make such a cool obesity awareness ad

people and buildings melting with really serious voice over
 

Hannargh

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I don't think you quite get it, Cadbury wants us to imagine a world made up of chocolate, they don't want us to image the world we live in now as a place of chocolate. So teeth won't rot cause they will already be chocolate, the chocolate sun won't melt chocolate bridges because the sun is made of chocolate. If the sun was capable of melting bridges, then it'd be capable of melting itself.

The consumers are meant to think up of the exciting fantasy world because we'd find it more interesting, and more likely to buy the product, than if we were to just imagine our boring lives made of chocolate.
 

ClockworkSoldier

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But the entire concept of a chocolate world is flawed. You wouldn't be able to eat chocolate with chocolate teeth cause you'll basically end up eating your own teeth etc.
 
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I would imagine basic elements like hydrogen, carbon, oxygen and so on. This I imagine would have a huge impact on the forming of the planets themselves, let alone the stars. But let's put that aside and assume that planet earth somehow formed in the universe and existed as it does now.
Umm... the early universe only had liek H, He and Li which underwent nuclear fusion to make moar elements, liek Be and He nuclei and join to form C nuclei 'n' shit.
 

Chemical Ali

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in the cadbury world of chocolate, the entire universe would periodically shrink and decrease in quality, but be contained in incrementally fancier packaging
 
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abbeyroad

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what happens when you have sex? will you ejaculate cocoa juice instead of man juice?
 

jb_nc

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best post evar
 

badquinton304

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in the cadbury world of chocolate, the entire universe would periodically shrink and decrease in quality, but be contained in incrementally fancier packaging
I know 50g less chocolate for a new cardboard package that allows the chocolate to slide out.
 

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