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anne1010

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you guys thinking about it from the point of view that youre the one with all the money. put your self in the other persons shoes. is that fair on them? and dont just make cheating the main reason of divorce. what if its just a loss of love?
 

katie tully

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lol im not 12. i know things arnt black and white. and thats my point exactly, marriage is a business proposal in most cases and thats why pre nups are needed. and im saying thats wrong. people have stopped getting married from love.

think about your rents. in my case, my mum was a stay at home mum. now if my parents were to get a divorce and they had a prenup, should my mum be left with nothing? no way. she works just as hard as my dad. should she be forced to live in a lower social class after being subject to a different for so many years of her life because she didnt work? no way.
nobody is forcing her to live in a lower social class. if she wants to be maintained in the manner to which she has become accustomed, she can get a job. god you are retarded though, you keep banging on about this pre nup thing. the purpose of the pre nup is to protect *both* parties. if she signed a pre nup, one would hope she was smart enough to make sure it made provisions for her and the kids in the event of a divorce. the courts are generally very favourable to mothers so the prospect of her getting nothing in the divorce is nill.
 

anne1010

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nobody is forcing her to live in a lower social class. if she wants to be maintained in the manner to which she has become accustomed, she can get a job. god you are retarded though, you keep banging on about this pre nup thing. the purpose of the pre nup is to protect *both* parties. if she signed a pre nup, one would hope she was smart enough to make sure it made provisions for her and the kids in the event of a divorce. the courts are generally very favourable to mothers so the prospect of her getting nothing in the divorce is nill.
and how much is the starting wage for someone? even if she had 10 years experience, would it be like someone who had 20? not at all, and the pay will show this.
youre basically saying that in a marriage, both parties should fend of themselves. that incase they get a divorce, they wont be loosing out or severely affected.

and no need to call people retarded for having a different opinion to yourself :)
 

katie tully

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and how much is the starting wage for someone? even if she had 10 years experience, would it be like someone who had 20? not at all, and the pay will show this.
youre basically saying that in a marriage, both parties should fend of themselves. that incase they get a divorce, they wont be loosing out or severely affected.

and no need to call people retarded for having a different opinion to yourself :)
what? how much is the starting wage for what exactly? what is she trained in... so what if she doesnt get paid the same as somebody who has 20 years experience, that's because she doesn't have 20 years experience!!! i don't understand the point you're trying to make, or maybe i do. you're saying that because your mother decided to sit at home and not do anything, she should remain remunerated by her husband/ex husband because her earning capability is significantly reduced compared to somebody who didn't stay at home.

my question is, after the kids go to school what excuse is there for somebody to be a stay at home mum? you're not at home with the kids anymore, the kids are at school. thus there is no reason why the mother cannot take that opportunity to re skill, update skills or choose another profession.

"youre basically saying that in a marriage, both parties should fend of themselves."

that's not what i'm saying at all. i am saying that if either party was in any way smart, they would make sure that the prenuptial was fair and equitable for both parties - not just the party that earns the most. i'm saying that after this dissolution of the marriage, there is no longer an onus on the ex husband to maintain the lifestyle of the previous wife, except to provide child support for the kids. if the ex wife suddenly finds that she is no longer able to afford the lifestyle she once had, she should:
a. downgrade her lifestyle
b. get a job

if the mother did not make provisions during the marriage to maintain employment skills or undertake education, then she is heaps dumb and deserves nothing more than the bare essentials
 

anne1010

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alot of people dont want their kids in before/after school care. finding a part time job that will let you work 9:30 - 2:30 as a qualified profession isnt easy.
 

katie tully

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alot of people dont want their kids in before/after school care. finding a part time job that will let you work 9:30 - 2:30 as a qualified profession isnt easy.
Get over it then. If sending your kids to after school care between the ages of 7-18 causes you untold distress, so much so you can't get a job, then I refuse to see how you can believe they are in any way entitled to be maintained in a particular lifestyle.
 
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If I end up marrying a rich dude, I would be a stay at home mum until my kid starts school, and then work part time while they're in primary, and then full time when they're in high school :)
But if he isn't rich, then i'll work normally+ just pay for child care/babysitter.

Sounds like a plan :D
 

stampede

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thread is too long/boring to read every single post i see we're talkin about prenups now

i would get a prenup lol come on who wouldnt wat is wrong with you people
 

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I want the set up to kinda be like bride wars in the plaza
that was so pretty
not gonna lie, that movie brings out the "girl" in me like nothing else.

I have thought about my wedding quite a bit. I'd like my dress to look like this, but with more lace on the bodice and skirt, and white (of course :p) with little lace capped sleeves. Also, I don't want to wear a veil.



I'd like the table settings to look like this, no balloons and gardenias instead of those green-ish flowers and a really simple white cake, 2 tiers with gardenias on it, cake boss style. Really simple reception at some nice restaurant near by, white table settings and a really simple, light lunch. I want it to be pretty casual so people feel comfortable, and it'll be a lot cheaper that way. I could definitely do my wedding for 7k, including my dress.


I want to get married under a HUGE tree (I love trees) with simple white chairs.





prenup so essential
so so essential
Actually, I think prenups are a good idea if it's fair.

Ie: everything split in half, unless one party cheated on the other, where you would then split things 60/40 as a punishment. Also, equal custody of your kids and like what zombie said, what belongs to you before the marriage stays yours.
Fuck that. I am so confident that I could never do something like that. I would never cheat, and I would never make my husband pay if he cheated. Imagine how bad you would feel if you cheated on your husband- I couldn't "punish" him by making him pay. I would be absolutely heart broken, and I'd never be able to take him back because I'm not gonna be "that girl", but how can you possibly put a price on your marriage like that? It'd be over, and I'd possibly use the fact that he cheated to get the nice vase that I liked or something (haha) but to take half of his hard earned money because he slept with someone else would make me just as bad, if not worse.

If I fell out of love with my husband and it could not be remedied (I'd try my darndest), I would never take anything of his that I didn't deserve. Putting myself in his shoes and also considering how you could possibly do that to someone you once loved so much.

I know you say "people change" but you don't change your opinion about something like that.

/rant.

EDIT: also, if we had children, I'd never prevent him from seeing them unless he was unfit. Imagine how you'd feel if your mum didn't let you see your dad. That's fucked, m8. When you have kids, nothing is about you anymore (to an extent), everything you do is for your kids, from the moment you find out your pregnant.
I reckon I've got myself pretty well sorted about all this and I'd be a good judge of character when choosing a partner 5lyf. When it comes to providing for the kids, I'd expect my husband to help me and I'd help my husband.
 
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anne1010

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i also cant wait for friends and cousins to start getting married.
 
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people dont change over night. if he failed to see a change in her, then too bad for him.
lol even if he did notice the change, after several years of marriage, what could he do about it without a prenup? divorce her for becoming a gold digger?
 
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lol im not 12. i know things arnt black and white. and thats my point exactly, marriage is a business proposal in most cases and thats why pre nups are needed. and im saying thats wrong. people have stopped getting married from love.

think about your rents. in my case, my mum was a stay at home mum. now if my parents were to get a divorce and they had a prenup, should my mum be left with nothing? no way. she works just as hard as my dad. should she be forced to live in a lower social class after being subject to a different for so many years of her life because she didnt work? no way.
lol its pretty well documented that you will probably not love the same person forever

after the divorce she would be forced to live in whatever social class that her new income would allow (which is dependant on her skills and experience, if she has none, shes not going to earn much)
 
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you guys thinking about it from the point of view that youre the one with all the money. put your self in the other persons shoes. is that fair on them? and dont just make cheating the main reason of divorce. what if its just a loss of love?
i wouldnt be in that situation though

a person is only worth what they themselves can obtain through their job. if they enter into a contract with someone else and that person pays for them to live then they exit that contract with the other person, they will then have to live off whatever money they can obtain lol
 

Dr_Fresh

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What happened to dis thread. All the posts r essay length lol.
Weddings should be fun, not just a ceremony with some food and kind chatter. Big ass party with strippers and good booze is the way to go IMO
 

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