I'M DONE....help me please (1 Viewer)

[tloos]

Hey Guys, as you would know I am in year 11. I have my preliminary exams in 5 and a half weeks. I need a filter so this is it.
I am stressed to the core, I have set out study timetables but haven't been sticking to them, I am overwhelmed, I am tired, I feel worn out. I just want to fall asleep and not wake up. I don;t know what in the world is my problem, I have it easier than most but I just want to cry and cry. Year 11 has killed me, everything around me has killed me. It started few months back, got my report back, did poor. Not a dumb kid just don;t apply myself and relaxed too much. My parents took everything from me. I haven;t had a phone for 3 months, I had my console taken away from me, music taken away from me, even some of the soccer season away from me. They are always calling my teachers and always putting me down and constantly telling me I need to work hard. It kills me, i just want to leave, walk away, school and my home life is killing me aha. I sound like a dramatist but I don;t know what else to say. Even writing this post i am shaking. My fitness has decreased, I used to be fit, abs, sporty as, and now everything has gone downhill. I used to be always in the gym, but then parents took it away from me, told me to stop focusing on my body and to focus solely on school. Then i gained weight, I was admittedly getting great marks and more happier, but then they kept name calling me FAT etc, looking at me weird, telling me to get fit again. It is horrible, i really don;t like them, i don;t like many people. I just want to be by myself. my aim is to prove them wrong, everyone wrong. I want to try and balance fitness, mental headspace and also smash my marks at school, like get amszing marks. I'm really in a dark place, I am really struggling, i need help to get my life back on track and how to deal with these prelims coming up and those negative influences around me. help please...

 

[Orwell]

Who else have you talked about this?

 

[tloos]

No one. Kept it to myself

 

[BandSixFix]

Hey man after hearing what you wrote I can see how life may seem rough right now. Firstly, I highly recommend you seek professional help in the form of a school counselor. In this, you may be able to talk about your problems to someone who has seen this for many years previously. Also, this may also lead to the school contacting your parents and negotiating the correct balance of sport, health and academics that will bring yourself to a state that makes you genuinely happy.

The HSC and Prelim years are very demanding for both the student and parents, with both desiring two different ways of passing the years. Have you tried speaking to your parents? And also, please don't keep it to yourself, the more you bottle things inside the more you'll feel more hurt and damaged. I know you may feel like there's no one to talk to but people are willing to reach out if you give them a chance - do you have any close friends at school?

Nonetheless, I still highly recommend you seek a school counselor or someone similar - as quickly as possible in so that your HSC will not be affected. And remember, ranks and everything all reset after prelim - you'll have a brand new chance at smashing everything and giving it your all

 

[Simorgh]

Can someone sum up what the OP just said? I don't seem to understand.

 

[eyeseeyou]

Can someone sum up what the OP just said? I don't seem to understand.

He's stressing and suffering physically and mentally and he really needs to get back on track ASAP because he doesn't want it to affect his HSC

 

[Orwell]

Hey man after hearing what you wrote I can see how life may seem rough right now. Firstly, I highly recommend you seek professional help in the form of a school counselor. In this, you may be able to talk about your problems to someone who has seen this for many years previously. Also, this may also lead to the school contacting your parents and negotiating the correct balance of sport, health and academics that will bring yourself to a state that makes you genuinely happy.

The HSC and Prelim years are very demanding for both the student and parents, with both desiring two different ways of passing the years. Have you tried speaking to your parents? And also, please don't keep it to yourself, the more you bottle things inside the more you'll feel more hurt and damaged. I know you may feel like there's no one to talk to but people are willing to reach out if you give them a chance - do you have any close friends at school?

Nonetheless, I still highly recommend you seek a school counselor or someone similar - as quickly as possible in so that your HSC will not be affected. And remember, ranks and everything all reset after prelim - you'll have a brand new chance at smashing everything and giving it your all

Basically this bro. Talk to someone and they can help you out, whether they provide you a healthy eating scheme, an efficient study scheme, whatever, just don't keep it to yourself and don't be embarrassed to explore that particular avenue - people like the school counsellor are there for a reason.

 

[Memphis Depay]

fk prelims. Worry about HSC

 

[Tamama251]

Yea just screw it.

 

[DepressedPenguino]

You need to find yourself. Asking yourself questions, travelling and speaking to people can help. As mentioned, year 11 does not matter so everything resets, which is good in your context. So, just ignore that. Focus on the future. What do you want to do in the future? What do you want to improve RIGHT NOW? Imagine yourself in one year's time what do you wish you could have done now? Have small daily goals on a sheet & tick when completing them. These should help build towards achieving to your life/long term goals otherwise you are walking down the wrong path. Also have rewards set up for yourself along the way. Just a heads up, the biggest thing after climbing out of that situation is realising how strong you can be and that you can do anything in the future. Good luck my friend.

 

[Flop21]

Jesus christ. This kid's parents are fucking evil. That's the problem. He's over stressing because he clearly has no way of doing anything for himself which leads to a really shitty mindset. We need to do things for ourselves, like music or gym, so we can relax and not burn out. Why the fuck would OP want to do school work when that's all he does? He goes to school to do work... comes home and does work... then all his has is his shitty family putting him down, and rinse and repeat. I'm not surprised OP just wants to sleep and never wake up.

There is nothing wrong with you OP. What's happening right now is a result of your home life and your parents. It's perfectly natural to slow down in terms of school performance when ALL you are doing is SCHOOL SCHOOL SCHOOL. You probably can't change them, so you'll have to accept that and try to put up with it. I suggest speaking with a professional like a psychologist who will hopefully work out some strategies on dealing with your parents, ignoring the insults and just being you.

Possibly if you're up for it, get a job, save for your own phone and gym membership. Because you really need to do some things for YOU, that YOU personally enjoy. THEN look at getting your marks back on track. We all need balance. Trust me.

But basically, fuck your parents. I truly think people should not have children if they're going to be shit parents.

 

[eyeseeyou]

Jesus christ. This kid's parents are fucking evil. That's the problem. He's over stressing because he clearly has no way of doing anything for himself which leads to a really shitty mindset. We need to do things for ourselves, like music or gym, so we can relax and not burn out. Why the fuck would OP want to do school work when that's all he does? He goes to school to do work... comes home and does work... then all his has is his shitty family putting him down, and rinse and repeat. I'm not surprised OP just wants to sleep and never wake up.

There is nothing wrong with you OP. What's happening right now is a result of your home life and your parents. It's perfectly natural to slow down in terms of school performance when ALL you are doing is SCHOOL SCHOOL SCHOOL. You probably can't change them, so you'll have to accept that and try to put up with it. I suggest speaking with a professional like a psychologist who will hopefully work out some strategies on dealing with your parents, ignoring the insults and just being you.

Possibly if you're up for it, get a job, save for your own phone and gym membership. Because you really need to do some things for YOU, that YOU personally enjoy. THEN look at getting your marks back on track. We all need balance. Trust me.

But basically, fuck your parents. I truly think people should not have children if they're going to be shit parents.

I would disagree with this, even though you may not live up to your family expectations, I think it's common etiquette that you do what your parents say and respect them for all the time and effort they put into improving your wellbeing

Even if you have 'shit parents' I think you still need to live up to them, because think of it like this-without your parents, where would you be in this world?

 

[Sien]

I would disagree with this, even though you may not live up to your family expectations, I think it's common etiquette that you do what your parents say and respect them for all the time and effort they put into improving your wellbeing

Even if you have 'shit parents' I think you still need to live up to them, because think of it like this-without your parents, where would you be in this world?

Wow first time I agreed with you lmao
But yea, while the parents' method is not right, you can't deny they probably want the best for their kid or else they wouldn't be criticizing his flaws in hopes to improve him.

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[Flop21]

I would disagree with this, even though you may not live up to your family expectations, I think it's common etiquette that you do what your parents say and respect them for all the time and effort they put into improving your wellbeing

Even if you have 'shit parents' I think you still need to live up to them, because think of it like this-without your parents, where would you be in this world?

Nope. You need to grow up and realise no one is perfect, not you or your parents.

It's wrong if you cannot take criticism for this very reason. Strive to continue learning and be willing to change when you realise a different way is better. When someone doesn't do this, it's fair to call them slack.

This problem is entirely his parents fault, they deserve to be criticised.

Wow first time I agreed with you lmao
But yea, while the parents' method is not right, you can't deny they probably want the best for their kid or else they wouldn't be criticizing his flaws in hopes to improve him.

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No one said this.

 

[Drongoski]

Jesus christ. This kid's parents are fucking evil.

But basically, fuck your parents. I truly think people should not have children if they're going to be shit parents.

I don't agree with you. How can you say this? Have you spoken to his parents and seen their points of view? And for a female, stop using unlady-like gutter language.

Whilst I'm sorry for the situation tloos finds himself in, there are 2 sides to the story. We just don't know the other side.

 

[RyanT7]

Well year 12 is around the corner, maybe you can use it as a clean slate

 

[RyanT7]

And for a female, stop using unlady-like gutter language.

brah, u just dug your own grave

 

[Simorgh]

brah, u just dug your own grave

this

 

[Flop21]

How can you say this? Have you spoken to his parents and seen their points of view?

Whilst I'm sorry for the situation tloos finds himself in, there are 2 sides to the story. We just don't know the other side.

??

What part of this 'side' will make you think "ahhh yes, this kid deserves to have no joy in his life".

Who do you think is going to tell this kid that what his parents are doing is not normal and not the right way to do things? His parents? Ha. No way. Someone needs to tell him, and I'm that person.

And for a female, stop using unlady-like gutter language.

Just saw this edit. Is this a joke? If so, it's a bad one. If not, who are you and why are you telling me what to do?

 

[eyeseeyou]

Nope. You need to grow up and realise no one is perfect, not you or your parents.

It's wrong if you cannot take criticism for this very reason. Strive to continue learning and be willing to change when you realise a different way is better. When someone doesn't do this, it's fair to call them slack.

This problem is entirely his parents fault, they deserve to be criticised.



No one said this.

Okay fine, I would agree with this that 'no one is perfect'. But seriously I don't think his parents would criticise him to make him upset or anything like that. As he said in his original post, it's about the academic pressure he faces and his parents' expectations of him to doing well. His parents would not treat him in the way they are treating him right now, if he actually did do well in school, but the thing is they are currently disappointed of him and want him to do well hence they are not being fair to him.

For some people who do not face academic expectations and pressure from their parents, they are still pressured to doing well academically and getting some of the best marks in the state-no matter how unrealistic it sounds

I guess to some extent, it's his parents fault-but you can't just be so critical of his parents actions (but they're mainly doing it for his benefit). I don't know how your parents raised you but if you ever do intend to become a parent, you'll probably want your child to do well academically and hence pressure him- even teachers at school do this (especially really scary and intimidating teachers)

Even if it weren't for his parents, he'd still face academic pressure (to some extent)

If you look at other countries, you'll understand the true meaning of academic pressure , not HSC academic pressure. Lots of students are expected by their parents to become either a lawyer or doctor, and obviously not everyone can because of their 'natural ability' and yet still parents critical of their children because they want to do what's best for them and help them have a better academic future-you see where I'm coming from