For the original person who started this thread.
Hey there, I can completely appreciate what you are feeling. There certainly is a very competitive attitude in Years 11 and 12 because the students are trying to be the best and get the best ranking. Rather, it would be more healthy if everyone helped eaac other and saw it that they were competing against the system to get the best marks as a cohort that they can.
That aside, though, can I suggest some thought about your mindset. The "fail" versus "success" mindset, focussing only on the goal of being first or top marks, is probably not the best way to go. Cold Chisel once said "the motion is its own reward" meaning that the journey towards the end result should be what you are trying to improve and the result itself is the happy ending that may come.
Here is an article that may help explain what I mean:
Fixed Mindset vs. Growth Mindset: Which One Are You? � Michael Graham Richard
It's a good idea to set goals, but set achievable goals that focus on the process (which you can control) rather than the result (which you can't). Aiming to be the best purely depends on making sure that no one else gets better and that teachers and exams will work in your favour.
Rather, setting a goal that I will understand that topic better (in a measurable way - ie will be able to write a comprehensive essay on that topic which I am happy with) or I will be able to explain to someone else the reasons for such and such... These are good goals.
In terms of fitting in, take it from someone who NEVER fitted in, try and find the group of misfits and fit in with them. They are usually far more accepting of new people. My friends were all the misfits and now we are the most cohesive group after school and the most diverse in terms of professions. We helped each other get through the HSC and in life.
30% may be a bad result to start with BUT, hey, look at it this way, you can only get better
Try and see the positive and lessons you can learn from your experiences (write a journal that aims to do that) and you are part way to changing to a Growth Mindset and feeling more motivated. It is easy to accept failure if you never try, but you can never succeed unless you do try. Take a chance. Ignore the competition and do YOUR thing.
And, even if your marks don't improve to the levels you really want, the HSC is not the ONLY way to reach your goals after school. Keep that in mind. It may take longer, but, remember, the journey will be fun and fulfilling and you will feel more achievement if you have to work harder to get there.
But the idea of seeing a Counsellor is a very good one. My son was having trouble with stuff at school. I took the last step of sending him to a Counsellor. They tended to just chat, but his attitude changed and he's doing much better now and is far more motivated. Ask the School Counsellor, maybe, to suggest a good Teen Counsellor you can see outside school (and sometimes provate health insurance covers the cost of this!).
I hope that helps a little. Good luck.
And some advice on how to change the mindset:
Mindset | How can you change from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset?