Cookie182
Individui Superiore
I have a hypothesis and it’s based on little more then observation, yet I'm keen to see if anyone else agrees.
As we learn from evolutionary biology, in the initial "courting" of a relationship the "male" tends to lead the interaction. This demonstration of masculine energy ultimately attracts the female. As research from Prof. David Buss (leading evo psychologist) suggests, males who demonstrate leadership and dominance over a woman in the initial stages trigger hard-wired survival and replication switches (the switches that the "new age" sensitive guy fails to flick and ultimately ends up as the "best friend"). The male generally leads the relationship in sexual interactions, dating decisions etc at least through the early stages...
Jump a few years into a marriage. I profoundly think that the most successful and happy marriages (at least in what I have seen) are now where the wife is in control of decisions and the husband obedient. This is even true under the conservative Christian “paradigm” of the family. Despite the stated role as the husband being the household leader, you can very much tell when old-skool politicians remark they are “lucky she had me” in regards to their wife (where does this suggest the power lies?).
Now I'm not at all suggesting anything is wrong with this, I was just wondering whether other people noticed this observation. The wife will often organise when the family is going to socialise (i.e. family dinners, parties etc), the schooling life of the kids, often the family books/budget (this depends I guess), tell the husband when jobs need doing etc and many times the husband, as to avoid conflict (and it is generally easier) will follow along gladly. Particularly if he is sexually rewarded, the relationship is stable and happy for both parties.
These relationships seem, at least on surface, to be the most successful in the long run, despite the common joke that the husband is "completely whipped". Marriages that I have seen where I know there is a lot of fighting are generally where the husband constantly resists the wife's direction and attempts to savour his once-had dominance, often leads to anger and frustration. Sadly, this can also lead to abuse when some men become infuriated and go too far.
Anyway, I have nothing empirical on this, perhaps there have been some studies. Interesting thoughts for you all...
Any sociology/gender theorists with something actually academic to say on this?
As we learn from evolutionary biology, in the initial "courting" of a relationship the "male" tends to lead the interaction. This demonstration of masculine energy ultimately attracts the female. As research from Prof. David Buss (leading evo psychologist) suggests, males who demonstrate leadership and dominance over a woman in the initial stages trigger hard-wired survival and replication switches (the switches that the "new age" sensitive guy fails to flick and ultimately ends up as the "best friend"). The male generally leads the relationship in sexual interactions, dating decisions etc at least through the early stages...
Jump a few years into a marriage. I profoundly think that the most successful and happy marriages (at least in what I have seen) are now where the wife is in control of decisions and the husband obedient. This is even true under the conservative Christian “paradigm” of the family. Despite the stated role as the husband being the household leader, you can very much tell when old-skool politicians remark they are “lucky she had me” in regards to their wife (where does this suggest the power lies?).
Now I'm not at all suggesting anything is wrong with this, I was just wondering whether other people noticed this observation. The wife will often organise when the family is going to socialise (i.e. family dinners, parties etc), the schooling life of the kids, often the family books/budget (this depends I guess), tell the husband when jobs need doing etc and many times the husband, as to avoid conflict (and it is generally easier) will follow along gladly. Particularly if he is sexually rewarded, the relationship is stable and happy for both parties.
These relationships seem, at least on surface, to be the most successful in the long run, despite the common joke that the husband is "completely whipped". Marriages that I have seen where I know there is a lot of fighting are generally where the husband constantly resists the wife's direction and attempts to savour his once-had dominance, often leads to anger and frustration. Sadly, this can also lead to abuse when some men become infuriated and go too far.
Anyway, I have nothing empirical on this, perhaps there have been some studies. Interesting thoughts for you all...
Any sociology/gender theorists with something actually academic to say on this?
