• Congratulations to the Class of 2024 on your results!
    Let us know how you went here
    Got a question about your uni preferences? Ask us here

Belonging Thesis (3 Viewers)

ando08182

Member
Joined
Mar 25, 2012
Messages
36
Location
Bowral
Gender
Male
HSC
2013
Can our aspects be all most anything? I don't know whether I should go along the path of identity, Understanding and relationships OR Belonging to a society, to the wider world, and to other people/s eg family or friends etc. Is there a stronger set of aspects I can use that will fit well with my texts or any text?
 

ando08182

Member
Joined
Mar 25, 2012
Messages
36
Location
Bowral
Gender
Male
HSC
2013
Oh and this is my thesis so far with the question "people experience a sense of belonging in varied and complex ways. Explore this view with a detailed reference to your prescribed text and your own piece of related material in relation to how you have used visual techniques in your Visual Representation."


“People experience a sense of belonging in varied and complex ways”

The desire to belong is an inevitable aspect of the human condition, that relies on an individuals perception of affiliation to people or places. An individuals perception is shaped by various past and present experiences, attitudes and circumstances; and it’s how these particular experiences, attitudes and circumstances affect an individuals life, that determines how people belong and don’t belong in these varied and complex ways. However in Peter Skrzynecki’s “Post Card and St Patrick’s College”, and Sean Penn’s 2007 film, Into the Wild , the notions of identity, relationships and understanding, help each texts protagonists, experience in this sense of belonging, not belonging or any degree of belonging in-between.



Does this provide a good argument or does it lack anything? Thanks for the feedback I really appreciate it :)
 

Absolutezero

real human bean
Joined
Nov 17, 2007
Messages
15,077
Gender
Male
HSC
N/A
Oh and this is my thesis so far with the question "people experience a sense of belonging in varied and complex ways. Explore this view with a detailed reference to your prescribed text and your own piece of related material in relation to how you have used visual techniques in your Visual Representation."


“People experience a sense of belonging in varied and complex ways”

The desire to belong is an inevitable aspect of the human condition, that relies on an individuals perception of affiliation to people or places. An individuals perception is shaped by various past and present experiences, attitudes and circumstances; and it’s how these particular experiences, attitudes and circumstances affect an individuals life, that determines how people belong and don’t belong in these varied and complex ways. However in Peter Skrzynecki’s “Post Card and St Patrick’s College”, and Sean Penn’s 2007 film, Into the Wild , the notions of identity, relationships and understanding, help each texts protagonists, experience in this sense of belonging, not belonging or any degree of belonging in-between.



Does this provide a good argument or does it lack anything? Thanks for the feedback I really appreciate it :)
It's the right idea, but it's far too verbose. Also, your introduction of the ideas should be tied better to the texts, not just listed straight afterwards.
 

ando08182

Member
Joined
Mar 25, 2012
Messages
36
Location
Bowral
Gender
Male
HSC
2013
It's the right idea, but it's far too verbose. Also, your introduction of the ideas should be tied better to the texts, not just listed straight afterwards.
Yeah I get what your saying but when its tightened up it feels like it loses the essence of what I'm saying. I just have to find that in-between that still answers the question
 

ando08182

Member
Joined
Mar 25, 2012
Messages
36
Location
Bowral
Gender
Male
HSC
2013
It's the right idea, but it's far too verbose. Also, your introduction of the ideas should be tied better to the texts, not just listed straight afterwards.
Because I'm a perfectionist and my english teacher refuses to give advice an asssessment related questions or material, can someone give me feedback on this Thesis? Any constructive criticism would be great!


“People experience a sense of belonging in varied and complex ways”

The desire to belong is an inevitable aspect of the human condition, that relies on an individuals perception of affiliation to people or places. An individuals perception is shaped by various past and present experiences, attitudes and circumstances; and this determines how people develop a sense of belonging such as in Peter Skrzynecki’s “Post Card and St Patrick’s College”, and Sean Penn’s 2007 film, Into the Wild . The notions of identity, relationships and understanding, assist each protagonist of the texts, to experience this sense of belonging, not belonging or any degree of belonging in-between.


Cheers
 

usernaming

New Member
Joined
Nov 11, 2012
Messages
16
Gender
Female
HSC
2013
Hey, I'd be interested to read more of belonging and Ben Folds' 'One Angry Dwarf...' if you've still got it?!
Many thanks :)
 

strawberrye

Premium Member
Joined
Aug 23, 2012
Messages
3,292
Location
Sydney
Gender
Female
HSC
2013
Uni Grad
2018
Because I'm a perfectionist and my english teacher refuses to give advice an asssessment related questions or material, can someone give me feedback on this Thesis? Any constructive criticism would be great!


“People experience a sense of belonging in varied and complex ways”

The desire to belong is an inevitable aspect of the human condition, that relies on an individuals perception of affiliation to people or places. An individuals perception is shaped by various past and present experiences, attitudes and circumstances; and this determines how people develop a sense of belonging such as in Peter Skrzynecki’s “Post Card and St Patrick’s College”, and Sean Penn’s 2007 film, Into the Wild . The notions of identity, relationships and understanding, assist each protagonist of the texts, to experience this sense of belonging, not belonging or any degree of belonging in-between.


Cheers
You need to actually state the fact that those two poems written by Peter Skrzynecki came from the Immigrant Chronicle-which is the prescribed text on the belonging text list, for the film, you need to be using double inverted commas for the title, for the poems, you should be using single inverted commas around the title of each poem. Your concluding sentences does not directly answer the question, and you should never mention words such as 'assist each protagonist of the texts' in your general thesis statement because it doesn't help to show the universally complex nature of belonging.
 

Users Who Are Viewing This Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 3)

Top