best way to dump a guy? (1 Viewer)

[i-c-lil-ppl]

so i have been seeing this guy for a month now and its clear this relationship isnt going anywhere good.

1. he always shows up at least 30 min late and expects me to forgive him straight away, or tries to make up for it with a kiss. I feel like im treated like rubbish.

2. He never tells me anything nice, how i look, personality etc. His comments are always negative, "when is your baby due?" and im perfectly healthy 175cm tall 60kg.

3.I asked if i could start calling him my boyfriend, and he keeps jokingly suggesting 'friends with benifits' and finally said "okaaay"

4. everytime i see him he is more interested in making out with me rather than getting to know me. Each time he just pushes more and more and we talk less and less. I just feel so used.

Quite frankly its obvious he is more interested in touching my body than my heart.

So how do i break up with him?

 

[katie tully]

with a sledgehammer

 

[katie tully]

hold on - wait.

if he isn't letting you call him bf, then technically you're not going out with him - thus there is nothing to break off

are you semi retarded?

 

[i-c-lil-ppl]

geez arent you polite

he said he wants to stick around though and told his friends about me.

well whatever it is called it still needs ending

 

[RogueAcademic]

so i have been seeing this guy for a month now and its clear this relationship isnt going anywhere good.

1. he always shows up at least 30 min late and expects me to forgive him straight away, or tries to make up for it with a kiss. I feel like im treated like rubbish.

2. He never tells me anything nice, how i look, personality etc. His comments are always negative, "when is your baby due?" and im perfectly healthy 175cm tall 60kg.

3.I asked if i could start calling him my boyfriend, and he keeps jokingly suggesting 'friends with benifits' and finally said "okaaay"

4. everytime i see him he is more interested in making out with me rather than getting to know me. Each time he just pushes more and more and we talk less and less. I just feel so used.

Quite frankly its obvious he is more interested in touching my body than my heart.

So how do i break up with him?

You could quite easily print out exactly what you've told us in your first post and hand it to him, explaining very clearly that it's over and "Here are the reasons why."

From the way you've described him, he sounds like an immature little shit, to be honest. That's obviously how you view him.

 

[katie tully]

so ... stop calling him .. tell him you're over it, adios...

it's not actually that complicated, hey.

it's not like he is doting on you, smothering you, involved in you, calling you all day, telling you he loves you...etc

seems fairly straightforward - you're a fuck buddy. there appears to be no real emotional attachment that can't handle a simple 'it's over'

 

[i-c-lil-ppl]

ye well i was asking for the medium? face to face? call? txt? email?
i dont know how much respect he deserves in it.

and the wording? should i give him my reasons or just its over?

 

[hermand]

call. that way you're not being rude to him and you keep your pride but he doesn't deserve a face to face.

only give him reasons if he asks for them.

 

[katie tully]

does it matter? you don't owe him the effort and respect that a face to face break up would require, unless you feel obligated

i'd just call or text him, and it's not like you need to give an epic essay to explain your reasons - just say you've had enough, it's not working, it doesn't suit you, blah blah blah idk

 

[NorthRiversMatt]

Is that you in display picture? Are you sure about breaking up with him? Why not the problems to be fixed up?

 

[katie tully]

you are hot. i am an awkward virgin. will you go out with me?

eft

 

[hermand]

Is that you in display picture? Are you sure about breaking up with him? Why not the problems to be fixed up?

if she's been with him for a month and he treats her like that, it's not worth it.

 

[i-c-lil-ppl]

ye its me in the dp...does it matter?

ok thanks for the advice all i needed to know !

 

[i-c-lil-ppl]

by the way why would i want to try and fix the problems? im not a needy person and if i bend over backwards to fix things he is just gonna keep using me.

i have already pointed out many times im not impressed with his lateness. and he still hasnt changed.

 

[RogueAcademic]

ye well i was asking for the medium? face to face? call? txt? email?
i dont know how much respect he deserves in it.

and the wording? should i give him my reasons or just its over?

If you give him your reasons, then it gives him no good reason to keep coming back and pestering you with "why?" questions or "oh come on, baby". If he doesn't realise why, he might keep coming back thinking he's still got a chance.

It's up to you whether you want to do it face to face or by email (emailing him a letter with reasons). You know yourself and him best.

All I can say is, you don't have to behave like an immature shit in the way you break up, just because he's been an immature little shit to you.

 

[i-c-lil-ppl]

If you give him your reasons, then it gives him no good reason to keep coming back and pestering you with "why?" questions or "oh come on, baby". If he doesn't realise why, he might keep coming back thinking he's still got a chance.

It's up to you whether you want to do it face to face or by email (emailing him a letter with reasons). You know yourself and him best.

All I can say is, you don't have to behave like an immature shit in the way you break up, just because he's been an immature little shit to you.

thank you ! thats some genuine advice there

 

[katie tully]

facepalm

 

[NorthRiversMatt]

Ok let see.......

Best way to dump him is to tell him how you feel about the situation that doesn't work for you. MUST say something that is assertive, not cruelity and that etc. Otherwise he would attack you one day for that kind of reason. Think about it.

 

[boris]

lol cool thrad guys

 

[SylviaB]

Give him a hand job and just as he blows tell him you don't think you should go out anymore.