Could someone give an opinion on mine please?
Basically it's about a man who is relaying his experience when he saw an old lady in the slums, smoking, and how she is closely linked to his wife. His wife passed away from lung cancer (non smoker) because she lost 'the fire in her eyes'. But he still sees the fire in the older ladies eyes. Him, his wife, and the old lady, all belong together because of their experiences, and at the end, it ends up he is telling the story from his hospital bed, because he has lost both of his kidneys, and how he wont let the fire go out in his eyes.
I used more descriptive language, but just to give you an idea of the plot. Also i didn't just state how their sense of belonging is related so bluntly in my story. But just what do you think as a generally idea
thanks