He calls me mum. (1 Viewer)

[ShadowLighte]

I feel really weird. When you have a friend of the gender that you're attracted to and they just consider you a friend, that's pretty sad. Being in the "friendzone" or whatever. But I've gone past that. I didn't even know it existed. My guy friend calls me "mum". I don't get it. I have never been called that nor have I heard anyone being called that except for actual mums, obviously.

But why? I wouldn't really say I'm motherly. Maybe I am, I don't know. My mum never really acted the way mothers are stereotyped to be. Yeah, I know it's a stereotype but I mean, she was never really caring or nurturing. I guess it's because I turned out to be everything that she wasn't and she hates it. Emotional, quiet, wanting to care about everyone etc.

I do give him advice. Or tell him things that would benefit him but I'm not naggy. Like the last time he said he thought he was going to fail a subject and whatnot I said something like "the way to do it is go to your syllabus and make sure you can answer all of the dot points. If you can, then you'll be fine. If not, then find the answer and learn it" and he said I sounded like a mum and then that kinda .. well yeah. Whenever I give him advice he's like "thank you mum" or when he's doing a last minute assessment he asks me for help and says "you're the mum, you should've told me to do it earlier". I don't even know how to respond anymore.

So um, anyway, what do I make of this? I'd also kind of get it if he was younger and he saw me as like an older sister or a second mother if his was busy or something but nope.

 

[ShadowLighte]

Wait, does he perhaps *want* another motherly figure? I don't really know who would and I mean, he has one but she doesn't really give him advice and lets him do whatever he wants.

 

[Shadowdude]

sup person with the same name prefix as me


Uhh, I would tell him to stop it because it's creepy. Maybe preface it nicely with like, "Why do you even call me that?" next time he does. But like... your aim should be to stop it.

 

[bongoli]

maybe he has a creepy fetish lol

 

[iBibah]

I feel really weird. When you have a friend of the gender that you're attracted to and they just consider you a friend, that's pretty sad. Being in the "friendzone" or whatever. But I've gone past that. I didn't even know it existed. My guy friend calls me "mum". I don't get it. I have never been called that nor have I heard anyone being called that except for actual mums, obviously.

But why? I wouldn't really say I'm motherly. Maybe I am, I don't know. My mum never really acted the way mothers are stereotyped to be. Yeah, I know it's a stereotype but I mean, she was never really caring or nurturing. I guess it's because I turned out to be everything that she wasn't and she hates it. Emotional, quiet, wanting to care about everyone etc.

I do give him advice. Or tell him things that would benefit him but I'm not naggy. Like the last time he said he thought he was going to fail a subject and whatnot I said something like "the way to do it is go to your syllabus and make sure you can answer all of the dot points. If you can, then you'll be fine. If not, then find the answer and learn it" and he said I sounded like a mum and then that kinda .. well yeah. Whenever I give him advice he's like "thank you mum" or when he's doing a last minute assessment he asks me for help and says "you're the mum, you should've told me to do it earlier". I don't even know how to respond anymore.

So um, anyway, what do I make of this? I'd also kind of get it if he was younger and he saw me as like an older sister or a second mother if his was busy or something but nope.

Wait, does he perhaps *want* another motherly figure? I don't really know who would and I mean, he has one but she doesn't really give him advice and lets him do whatever he wants.

It's not being said because he actually wants a motherly figure, he is saying it because the advice and things you say are what a mother would say.

It can be said as a sort of insult sometimes but he doesn't seem to mean it that way.

I think you're over thinking it, it's just a comment one makes when someone gives 'parental'-type advice. Also suggests you're much more mature than he is.

Doesn't rule out him being attracted to you btw, now or in the future, so don't get too worked up over it.

 

[Gary_Oak]

lol.... what a strange guy.... just shurg off the comment as if is nothing

 

[Queenroot]

He secretly means MILF

 

[emilios]

inb4 Oedipus complex.

Is your name Ophelia by any chance? Does your boyfriend often show signs of madness, intent to kill uncle, delusions of ghosts etc.. ?

 

[lilcutetricker]

As long as he doesnt have weird fantasies about him and you being a mother... you're good.

 

[Hagaren]

him: hey mum

you: quickest way to guarantee you'll never get laid is confusing chicks for your mother.

(do this in front of a group of people)

[edit:] probably shuts him up and possibly leads to him broaching the topic of sleeping with you.

 

[panda15]

We have this kid in my group that everyone calls mum. Because we all get heaps messy at parties and do stupid stuff, but he doesn't, and he always tries to talk us out of doing stupid stuff, so we call him mum.

But this guy does sound like he's taking it pretty far.

 

[Blue Suede]

Every friendship group has the 'mum' of the group. I'm definitely the mum of my high school friends. Saying things like 'yes, mum' when you give them advice can also just be a joke-y type of thing. Sounds like this guy is pushing it a bit far though.