Help needed...long story (1 Viewer)

[Odourless]

So theres this girl who I had been friends with for a few years and had liked for most of that. Now she liked me as well but we never really did much about it and were just friends. We started going out about 6 months ago and it was all pretty good. We were both in the same grade together but didn't really hang out together and had different groups of friends (I was friends with all her friends though but wouldnt really do stuff with them, just see them at parties and stuff) which didnt really matter to us as we were both pretty happy.

A couple of months ago she turned 18 which seemed to change things a bit as I don't turn 18 till early next year and so she would be going out without me. Which I didn't mind as I didn't really want her not to go places just because of me. One of her male friends (who I am kind of friends with as well) and her seem to be really close. There were a few times where I didn't really trust him but she said they were just good friends and I trusted her with that.

Now about a month ago she broke up with me saying that because she was 18 and with school stuff she didnt really want to be worrying about too much stuff and figured for now she didnt really want to be officially having a bf. I kind of took it alright as I knew something had been up with her for a while. I thought that it meant we would still be friends though and everything would be ok.

A few days after this I was at some persons house and it was really awkward between us and she didnt really seem to want to talk to me. The problem with this was she was getting really "chummy" with this other friend of hers. I was a bit upset by this but again she said that there was nothing going on between them.

I hadn't really spoken to her much since then but we graduated a couple of days ago and so school has finished. At a party last night I also noticed she and this guy were basically inseperable and very close.

So I'm pretty upset because I basically think she cheated on me and now I'm not really gonna be seeing her much again as school is over. I guess it just sucks because she has been the only girl I have really ever liked and has nearly everything I would look for in a girl.

I don't really know what to do now. Whether I should talk to her about stuff or anything. I don't want to make things to get worse than they are.

Any advice for one sad boy

I bet none of this makes sense and its just mindless rambling.......

 

[aimstar555]

it looks like u were completly into her and she wasn't quite on the same page, but it's OKAY that doesn't make u a bad person.
and maybe not see her is a good thing, it'll make the healing process a hell of a lot easier. my ex and i broke up over 4 months ago and i've only seen him ONCE and we were together for 2 years. it was hard neuff as it was
and as much as this hurts, trying to be friends with her again, DOSEN'T work. sure u could try and talk to her, but it sounds like she's moved on.
but keep ya head up, and just think once ur HSC's finished ur completly free for schoolies

 

[Odourless]

it looks like u were completly into her and she wasn't quite on the same page, but it's OKAY that doesn't make u a bad person.
and maybe not see her is a good thing, it'll make the healing process a hell of a lot easier. my ex and i broke up over 4 months ago and i've only seen him ONCE and we were together for 2 years. it was hard neuff as it was
and as much as this hurts, trying to be friends with her again, DOSEN'T work. sure u could try and talk to her, but it sounds like she's moved on.
but keep ya head up, and just think once ur HSC's finished ur completly free for schoolies

Yeh you are probably right. Its just really hard and strange after being good friends for so long. Oh well.....I'll get over it.

Schoolies cruise here I come

 

[Dimsimmer]

I would try to not worry about it that much. Friendships dont usually last very long and people change and their views also change. Just remember, there are other girls out there.

 

[Dreamerish*~]

If you're dying to know whether or not she cheated on you during your relationship, you can ask her politely.

Otherwise, this is just a simple case of unrequited feelings, no biggie. Give it a month or two and you'll be over it, trust me. You can't control her feelings, so it's just best to focus on something else. You're still young, there are plenty more girls to come.

When my ex broke up with me, I was probably even more upset than you, but after as little as a few days, I didn't really think about it anymore. You'll be surprised at how fast you get over these things.

 

[Snow Pea!]

in my opinion.. i dont think she cheated on you.. she proably wanted too (because they were close and all) and therefore broke up with you.. that way it didnt hurt you (well not as much as it would have been if she had cheated) but yeh.. ur going to have to move on.. it will all get better soon.. trust me

 

[iambored]

Don't jump to conclusions that she cheated on you. It will only make you more sad and you trusted her.

If she did cheat on you she doesn't have nearly everything you would look for in a girl, she has a huge flaw and you deserve a lot better

assuming you don't get back together with her:
your situation is hard because she is the only girl you have really liked. it can be really hard but you have to realise that and move on, you might even find a girl better than her now that you are able to spend some time without her on your mind. treat it as a time when you look at what other people are like, you have an idea of what you want so see who else is out there. don't worry too much about her, if you're meant to be together she will come back at sometime.

I think talking to her might be painful but it might be the only thing you can do to get her off your mind

Don't let it interfere with the hsc ok! Do your exams and deal with this later. you sound like a nice guy so don't get back with her if she treats you like crap.

 

[AsyLum]

Haha shit, the ole "things change, i just want to be alone" gig.

 

[Malazn Pleasure]

Any advice for one sad boy

I bet none of this makes sense and its just mindless rambling.......

chicks change from the ages of 17-22

dont trust chicks during this age coz they got no idea wat they want in their little pea brains

once a chick is 22+ shes mature n knows wat she wants in life

 

[azzie]

i sympathise with your situation, but all i have to say is something better WILL come along, so dont dwell on the fact that things with her didnt work out. my last breakup was pretty shit, but now i dont care about it or who the guy is with because ive found someone who's soooooooooooooo much better.
so thus, the moral of the story is move on and you'll find something better.

 

[Dreamerish*~]

Do you do this professionally or something?

Do what professionally? Getting over silly crushes? If that's it, there's a professional in all of us.

 

[katskaz]

u said sumtin like everything u look for in a girl, she had. what makes u think she's the only one? reading ur story, u sound like a guy that ne girl would be happy to be with! u sound as though u ARE looking for sumtin spesh. she obviously didnt see that n so stuff her! move on and find sum1 else who'll return ur feelings...

 

[Bradna]

Go mental at her, it'll make you feel better!

 

[santaslayer]

I don't think it really matters anymore. The truth might cut you more.

 

[Serius]

So theres this girl who I had been friends with for a few years and had liked for most of that. Now she liked me as well but we never really did much about it and were just friends. We started going out about 6 months ago and it was all pretty good. We were both in the same grade together but didn't really hang out together and had different groups of friends (I was friends with all her friends though but wouldnt really do stuff with them, just see them at parties and stuff) which didnt really matter to us as we were both pretty happy.

A couple of months ago she turned 18 which seemed to change things a bit as I don't turn 18 till early next year and so she would be going out without me. Which I didn't mind as I didn't really want her not to go places just because of me. One of her male friends (who I am kind of friends with as well) and her seem to be really close. There were a few times where I didn't really trust him but she said they were just good friends and I trusted her with that.

Now about a month ago she broke up with me saying that because she was 18 and with school stuff she didnt really want to be worrying about too much stuff and figured for now she didnt really want to be officially having a bf. I kind of took it alright as I knew something had been up with her for a while. I thought that it meant we would still be friends though and everything would be ok.

A few days after this I was at some persons house and it was really awkward between us and she didnt really seem to want to talk to me. The problem with this was she was getting really "chummy" with this other friend of hers. I was a bit upset by this but again she said that there was nothing going on between them.

I hadn't really spoken to her much since then but we graduated a couple of days ago and so school has finished. At a party last night I also noticed she and this guy were basically inseperable and very close.

So I'm pretty upset because I basically think she cheated on me and now I'm not really gonna be seeing her much again as school is over. I guess it just sucks because she has been the only girl I have really ever liked and has nearly everything I would look for in a girl.

I don't really know what to do now. Whether I should talk to her about stuff or anything. I don't want to make things to get worse than they are.

Any advice for one sad boy

I bet none of this makes sense and its just mindless rambling.......

The Problem: Ok you broke up a nd she gave some bullshit reason for the breakup after you trusted her. The thing is that she was adamant[sp?] that she didnt cheat on you[ i will take it that both you and her think of cheating as in sleeping with others] BUT you are feeling pretty strong that this other guy had something to do with it. He probably has a thing for her and they probably kissed, so basically this other guy fucked you over and dissrepsected your relationship

The Solution part 1: This is what i honnest to god think you should do. Now you are fairly certain he had something to do with it and he trod on your grass, he started this and it didnt have to be this way but you are going to go to his house and kick the shit out of him, or if u are sure u will see him like at a party or something do it then. You are under 18 so nothing much can happen to you legally at worst case scenario.

Just walk up to him, tell him " You undermined my relationship with [name] and iam going to fucking kill you, it didnt have to be this way, Remember YOU started this!" Then just deck him.
If you dont think u can beat him in a fight, use a baseball bat, a club or even a steering wheel lock lol.

If u dont beat the shit out of him you will regret it your whole life but if u do, it sends a message to other guys " dont mess with my relationships or THIS will happen"
extra points if the ex sees you beat the shit out of him, shows her who the real man is and makes her feel guilty.

The Solution part 2: Find one of the exs friends and get with her. Extra points if its her best friends. Double points if you bang her, triple if the ex walks in and sees lol.

gl and follow this simple plan to happyness and success in future relationships

 

[phunk_e]

This scenario sounds really familiar! i have been in the exact same position as your ex- girlfriend!
So i'll tell u what i was thinkin and that mite help u understand her actions.
--> I wanted 2 end my relationship for a couple of months, the spark had gone but i didnt want 2 hurt him. I was tempted to cheat, very tempted, but i never did out of respect for him. so hopefully she felt the same!
I used the exact same break up excuse. Its appealing because you dont actually hav 2 say- 'i dont like you anymore' and the idea was it wouldnt hurt them as much and we could remain friends. But staying friends doesnt work, not even a little bit. When he contacted me i just got angry. so you just got 2 give up on her completely before she starts to hate you.
Lastly, the reason i moved on so quickly was because i had been un-emotionally attatched for some time, even though i acted like i still liked the guy.
so anyway, hope that makes sense and helps you understand it from her point of view.
As 4 u, sorry! girls are twisted! but she tried to let you down nicely

 

[*yooneek*]

it must be heaps hard for you,
especially with the years of history you guys have together...
but i do not like the sound of her...
nope... shes bad news...
she may have very beautiful qualities, and have what you're looking for...
but just remember what she is like when she comes crawling back to you,
don't worry it sounds like u'll find someone with what you're looking for...
all in good timing