How protective are boys of our girls? (1 Viewer)

[Mongke]

id find it amusing if someone started flirting with my gf. id tease the hell out of her arfterwards tho its about security more than trust i think. if youre secure in your relationship and your position then it sholdnt be a problem. id only snap if the guy was disrespectful, i cant handle that, doesnt matter whoes gf it is.

 

[davin]

Yeah, he said that he was more "looking after me" and "wanting me to be the best and have the best..."
So after the long, heart felt apology I definitely felt better about the situation. It would be fantastic to be together, but the combination of a busy career, the HSC and distance makes it somewhat impossible. Which is why his reaction really wasn't expected.

Someday...

*Sigh.

yeah, its important for it to not come off as aggresive toward you though, i'd think. in that anger doesn't come off as concern. then again, concern can come off as jealousy, so its a tricky matter.

 

[dodgyfilokid]

Well, for me I have this really nasty habit of being insecure when someone I like starts seeing another bloke. I don't have a gf yet but as all my mates know, I get really irritated when I hear that a bloke kinda likes the same girl i like and vice versa. I do always tell d gal dat im like that but yer, its jz me and its a real nasty habit. Also, even tho I aint goin out wit dis gal atm, i treat our friendship as if we're goin out..she dusnt mind it but i dunno if im steppin on d line or not.

 

[pinkblinkbarbie]

Well, for me I have this really nasty habit of being insecure when someone I like starts seeing another bloke. I don't have a gf yet but as all my mates know, I get really irritated when I hear that a bloke kinda likes the same girl i like and vice versa. I do always tell d gal dat im like that but yer, its jz me and its a real nasty habit. Also, even tho I aint goin out wit dis gal atm, i treat our friendship as if we're goin out..she dusnt mind it but i dunno if im steppin on d line or not.

i think you are totally stepping OVER the line. my god, id run a mile if a guy treated our friendship like a relationship

 

[Collin]

we have this conversation. the "but if you trust me.." conversation. but it always ends up us fighting and him saying that i encrouage guys to want me and that if i didnt talk to my ex none of this would happen blah blah blah...he just makes shit up and blames everything on every other man on the planet...it gives me the shits.

Chances are he's over-reacting quite a bit, but there's always two sides to the story. Looking at the 'encouraging' assertion there, I should mention it's a well known fact that some girls flirt inadvertently. Not necessarily implying anything concrete, but accept that some of his argument may have merit.

But if this shit keeps up, you guys are doomed.

 

[Collin]

Well, for me I have this really nasty habit of being insecure when someone I like starts seeing another bloke. I don't have a gf yet but as all my mates know, I get really irritated when I hear that a bloke kinda likes the same girl i like and vice versa. I do always tell d gal dat im like that but yer, its jz me and its a real nasty habit.

That's normal dude. I wouldn't say insecure is the word for me, more like irritated, but I know what you mean. But hey, nothing wrong with a little competition right?

 

[pinkblinkbarbie]

Chances are he's over-reacting quite a bit, but there's always two sides to the story. Looking at the 'encouraging' assertion there, I should mention it's a well known fact that some girls flirt inadvertently. Not necessarily implying anything concrete, but accept that some of his argument may have merit.

But if this shit keeps up, you guys are doomed.

oh thanks for the confidence.

mm not sounding up myself or anything, but i have eyes only for him and i dont flirt with other guys. if guys ever start flirting with me i usually leave them be and join my boyfriend.

we have been together for 2 years and so far we havent even come close to a break up. i can handle him being jealous, but sometimes id like a bit more freedom then he gives me..

shit now he sounds like a abd boyfriend when he isnt

 

[Collin]

2 years? I retract my comment, especially since you said you usually leave guys when they start to flirt with you.

I don't think he's a 'bad boyfriend', just someone who is incredibly insecure. I reckon his points have some merit, but no doubt he is over-reacting way too much also.

If you guys have been together for 2 years, surely you can communicate better than resulting into a fight each time over this issue. Keep talking to him, and emphasise how you leave guys when they start to flirt with you and that he's being way too controlling unnecessarily.

 

[pinkblinkbarbie]

thanks JKD, how many guys actually give advice, expecially on love? your a champ

 

[Serius]

While I'm pretty trustworthy of anyone I'd go out with, I would find it shits me off when a guy is obviously hitting on her when he knows she's taken, more cause he has the nerve to do it than because I think she's going to stray.

sometimes i hit on girls i know are taken as a joke[that no1 else is in on] its funny to see the bf reaction, especially if he gets violent, then its punch on! but they rarely get violent, just pissed off. It helps if u pick a girl whose bf isnt heaps big and could kick your ass.

 

[Collin]

thanks JKD, how many guys actually give advice, expecially on love? your a champ

It's cuz I'm GAY!!!!!!! LOLOL!111111

 

[withoutaface]

sometimes i hit on girls i know are taken as a joke[that no1 else is in on] its funny to see the bf reaction, especially if he gets violent, then its punch on! but they rarely get violent, just pissed off. It helps if u pick a girl whose bf isnt heaps big and could kick your ass.

The worst I'd do is walk over and put my arm around her. If he still doesn't get the idea I'd either just stand there laughing at him, or find some reason to whisk her away. But that'd be mostly if I saw she was uncomfortable.

 

[PLURFECT!]

Protectiveness isn't inheritly a bad thing. It can become a bad thing when:

a. There is missing trust somewhere along the lines
b. The girl is too flirty and invites issues
c. The guy has an anger problem
d. All of the above.

I like to know the guy I'm with feels protective for my wellbeing, but i think it's essential for mutual trust and faithfulness to be present, as well as appropriate reactions on both parts. IE: If some guy tries to drag me into his car, i'd hope my guy would deck the bastard!

 

[ogmzergrush]

It used to worry me a bit from time to time early on, but nowdays it's usually just a laugh. The people who do try tend to back down after realising that we're together, so there's no real need for it to go any further, and I don't actually recall anyone trying anything whilst knowing that she's not single.

I'm a little confused as to why some people seem to think being "protective" means not letting a girl talk to other guys? I'd be inclined to call that insecurity more than anything else. I always thought that being protective was making sure that bad things didn't happen to someone, like making sure they get home ok, stuff like that, not being some sadsack who sits in the corner and sulks for a week every time she speaks to a guy other than yourself.

 

[Casmira]

regardless how much a guy trusts you, he will always think the worse of you but never mean it personally because he'll think the same with any and all girls

if you saw a girl flirting with your guy although he didn't take it you'd have the shits too i suppose

 

[withoutaface]

regardless how much a guy trusts you, he will always think the worse of you but never mean it personally because he'll think the same with any and all girls

I'm not sure I understand what that sentence was supposed to mean, please elaborate.

 

[Casmira]

a guy will always hold the same insecurities about any girl he goes out with; ie. i was going on you saying earlier of a guy always thinking of the worst

 

[withoutaface]

Ah, I see, I thought you were implying that this was true for all men, rather than all cases of the same man

 

[Collin]

If some guy tries to drag me into his car, i'd hope my guy would deck the bastard!

As well as pressing charges.

 

[shortie_689]

Protectiveness isn't inheritly a bad thing. It can become a bad thing when:

a. There is missing trust somewhere along the lines
b. The girl is too flirty and invites issues
c. The guy has an anger problem
d. All of the above.

My bf has high double standards meaning he thinks its ok for him to continue talkin to girls if they are overtly flirting with him but when it comes to me if any guy trys to pick me up or talk to me i am "not allowed" he is so overprotective an tends to have an anger problem if he sees a guy talkin to me or checkin me out he will get very angry an tell me ive done somethin wrong to make him think that he has a chance... he says he trusts me an i do beleive that i think he is just scared that he will lose me