*big hugs to all the 05's*
I remember going through all of this... I used to rework my story from top to bottom, and if I didn't like something (normally halfway down the second page) I was utterly screwed... I remember staring at the screen for hours, freaking out and wondering how the heck I was going to make it work. Naturally, I REFUSED to move on until I was satisfied. Unfortunately, that could take weeks...
I usually only wrote when I was under pressure to. My dear EE2 teacher - Mrs D - figured this out fairly early on. That was when the phone calls - to the home phone!!! - started
for example: "If you don't have your full draft done by thursday next week, Bad Things Will Happen!"
My problem was in working myself up so much I couldn't write. If I actually started writing, usually everything turned out ok - but sitting there, and going "omg omg omg this is not working!!!! Why isn't it working? Why can't I think of a way to make it work!" - not good. It was because of this my writing was so sporadic - on good days when I just wrote without thinking too much, it was fine. On bad days when I was stressed and freaking out over the smallest of things, I used to just fall to pieces... nothing got done. If you're like me, just write - don't think! Even if your writing takes you into a completely new direction, let it.
Writing now is especially different. Thanks to the HSC, emotions are probably at an all-time-high and it can be very difficult to suddenly have to break out of the system - sure you have to write from your soul, but you ALSO have to be able to distance yourself somewhat to ensure your major work doesn't become an extended diary entry (or, to avoid many random articles in your journal... mysteriously appearing... by the thousands
). There's a beautiful quote from Finding Forrester I wrote in my journal: "The first draft comes from your heart, the second comes from your head". And that's the way it should be.
(for anyone who hasn't seen it yet, be ashamed of yourself, and rent it next weekend!)
Sometimes it can feel as if you're constantly butting your head against a brick wall in terms of where your major work is going - typical story, it started out as a good idea but you're running out of things to write about, or, it just doesn't feel right. Sometimes you just need a change of scene to get new inspiration to write - reading a new book, thinking as you walk home - sometimes it all just hits all of a sudden and it's like "wow! Now I know why it's not working! I'm going to take it into a new direction!". So, maybe you just need to tune out and go absorb yourself in something new like a movie (Finding Forrester, Finding Forrester, Finding Forrester!!!!) or book (far out, we really are geeks if our idea of a good time is a good book... *sigh* lol!).
Be wary of being overly picky - remember, your work as a whole is more important than the syntax of the one sentence (although if you are freaking out, talk to goldendawn... he and syntax/all things proper in the literary world are like *this* close). If you need someone to tell you to stop being paranoid, pm me and I'll add you to my msn list and personally send you "STOP BEING PARANOID" messages until it sinks in
And finally: Don't let the stupid HSC system make you cry! I'll beat it up if it does! (let's not talk about how for now - will figure that out later
) EE2 is subjective - always has been, always will be. To a certain extent, they either will or won't like your work - with that knowledge in mind, you don't really have to worry about whether it'll be "good" or not. Just write.
I think what's most important about EE2 is that you walk away having learnt something. Even if you look back later and despise your major work (give me two seconds, and I can rip my own major work into 16 pieces. I can't stand to look at it these days, and the only reason it remains on BOS is as an example of what you should NOT do), if you have learnt from the process, then you have gained something. Most people have never really written something on this scale before - now is the time to learn how your own writing process works, how to deal with the obstacles that come up, how to distance yourself from your work whilst still keeping that strong sense of yourself within it.
So long as you write the best work you think you can do, (oh, here we come with the HSC cliches) you've done all you can. You all have the talent and the passion just to get this far - now take this opportunity and use it! I know you can!
