• Congratulations to the Class of 2024 on your results!
    Let us know how you went here
    Got a question about your uni preferences? Ask us here

Talking to guys (1 Viewer)

Haruka

Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2012
Messages
66
Location
Sydney Inner West
Gender
Female
HSC
2014
Once a term, all of us Music students get to go on an excursion after school and there are all these REALLY attractive guys from other schools there... but the problem is, I'm terrible with talking to guys and it doesn't help that I've got my friend, who's nice but acts awkward in public, around. Should I try and approach people there? I'm really shy in some situations, and not good at approaching people. How do I talk to these guys confidently without my awkward friend getting in the way? (I've already learned from past experiences that a "hi, do you play Pokemon?" won't cut it :p)
 

nerdasdasd

Dont.msg.me.about.english
Joined
Jul 29, 2009
Messages
5,353
Location
A, A
Gender
Male
HSC
2012
Uni Grad
2017
Once a term, all of us Music students get to go on an excursion after school and there are all these REALLY attractive guys from other schools there... but the problem is, I'm terrible with talking to guys and it doesn't help that I've got my friend, who's nice but acts awkward in public, around. Should I try and approach people there? I'm really shy in some situations, and not good at approaching people. How do I talk to these guys confidently without my awkward friend getting in the way? (I've already learned from past experiences that a "hi, do you play Pokemon?" won't cut it :p)
Be friendly :D. Just go "Hi, my name is _____,
 

SpiralFlex

Well-Known Member
Joined
Dec 18, 2010
Messages
6,960
Gender
Female
HSC
N/A
I am a guy myself and the best way to start a conversation is to say hi. Or you can pretend to be lost and strike a conversation. "Hi (insert human name) I am a bit lost, would you point me to the direction of..., by the way my name is Haruka". You are at a young age, there is no shame in taking initiative.
 
Last edited:

hayabusaboston

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 26, 2011
Messages
2,387
Location
Calabi Yau Manifold
Gender
Male
HSC
2013
If you are interested in a guy, all you have to do is talk to him out of your OWN INITIATIVE

Srsly

Talk about anything at all

Just YOU start conversations with the guy.
 

LoveHateSchool

Retired Sept '14
Joined
Jan 30, 2009
Messages
5,136
Location
The Fires of Mordor
Gender
Female
HSC
2012
Uni Grad
2016
Ummm I've always operated with the philosophy that people are people...so it doesn't make a difference if I'm talking to a guy or a girl.

Striking up conversation is all about reading people to know what will make interesting dialogue with them. I find striking up conversation by commenting on something or asking a question about something, way less forced than immediately introducing yourself from the get go. Find a commonality, discuss it, and then do the whole name intro thing.

So if it's a music camp, and it's all musos, I think talking about music stuff, like what people play and stuff or stuff to do with the excursion is an easy icebreaker if you are stuck!
 

SylviaB

Just Bee Yourself 🐝
Joined
Nov 26, 2008
Messages
6,909
Location
Lidcombe
Gender
Female
HSC
2021
are you asian and if so are you planning on talking to asian guys

not even joking, it changes things entirely
 

enoilgam

Moderator
Moderator
Joined
Feb 11, 2011
Messages
11,906
Location
Mare Crisium
Gender
Undisclosed
HSC
2010
Striking up conversation is all about reading people to know what will make interesting dialogue with them. I find striking up conversation by commenting on something or asking a question about something, way less forced than immediately introducing yourself from the get go. Find a commonality, discuss it, and then do the whole name intro thing.

So if it's a music camp, and it's all musos, I think talking about music stuff, like what people play and stuff or stuff to do with the excursion is an easy icebreaker if you are stuck!
This is pretty much what I was going to say. Starting off with your name is pretty awkward - I think the key is being observant and being able to read people well. You might start a conversation from something really simple and tangible, like you might notice that they are wearing a footy jersey and you can talk to them about footy. Alternatively, you might notice that someone looks excited about something and that might be enough to get a conversation going.
 

Haruka

Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2012
Messages
66
Location
Sydney Inner West
Gender
Female
HSC
2014
are you asian and if so are you planning on talking to asian guys

not even joking, it changes things entirely
Nah, I'm Australian, but you were right on the wanting to talk to Asian guys thing... I just find them better-looking and more interesting than Anglo guys, plus I take a serious interest in their culture and have several Asian friends. Sorry if you think I should stick to my own kind... I can't help it :p
 

SpiralFlex

Well-Known Member
Joined
Dec 18, 2010
Messages
6,960
Gender
Female
HSC
N/A
Nah, I'm Australian, but you were right on the wanting to talk to Asian guys thing... I just find them better-looking and more interesting than Anglo guys, plus I take a serious interest in their culture and have several Asian friends. Sorry if you think I should stick to my own kind... I can't help it :p
Spiral is asian.
 

SylviaB

Just Bee Yourself 🐝
Joined
Nov 26, 2008
Messages
6,909
Location
Lidcombe
Gender
Female
HSC
2021
I think we're going to need photos to make any further judgements
 

Haruka

Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2012
Messages
66
Location
Sydney Inner West
Gender
Female
HSC
2014
I don't think I'm conventionally "pretty" at all... just average as far as looks go, if that's what you mean by photos...
 

SylviaB

Just Bee Yourself 🐝
Joined
Nov 26, 2008
Messages
6,909
Location
Lidcombe
Gender
Female
HSC
2021
Asians tend to be shy and I'm assuming you are too since you made this thread, so your best bet is to innocently ask them something unpersonal, like if you play the same instrument ask if his model is any good, or if its a non-musical socail event ask about whether he knows what the next activity is etc. Its hard to give questions without knowing the actual circumstances of the 'excursion', but you get my drift, just ask something you could ask anyone, or something that an old person trying to make chit-chat would ask you

and once you've been talking for a a little while introduce yourselves and give one of those flimsy little girl handshakes and laugh/smile, then maybe ask some personal stuff like how long hes been playing, what school he's from etc

if he's interested in you by this stage he should be trying to carry the conversation whenever you stop talking

if he doesn't, he's either painfully shy, in which case he's boring so leave him alone, or he doesn't like you, so just politely excuse yourself ('alright then, I'm going to go back to my friends, see you later on I guess') and consider it a learning experience for talking to guys
don't try and approach a group/as a group though, you're just asking for awkwardness



Haha, personality > looks :3.
nah thats not true at all, men care about looks more than anything, epsically when meeting a girl for the first time

Which is why, OP, to the extent you care about attracting 'attractive guys', you should do what you can to maximise your beauty i.e. put some remote effort into our hair/make-up/clothes
 
Last edited:

RealiseNothing

what is that?It is Cowpea
Joined
Jul 10, 2011
Messages
4,591
Location
Sydney
Gender
Male
HSC
2013
ask a guy if you can play with his instrument
In all honesty, if the guy finds you attractive he'd probs love this considering his age and (probably) hasn't gotten a girl before.

Or he could be creeped out, who knows, who cares.
 

Users Who Are Viewing This Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 1)

Top