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Well all my friends "grew up"... (1 Viewer)

Ingoesout

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What the fuck? So we've been at uni for a year and all of a sudden these holidays i've just realised how different we are.

I didn't really realise until my self and 2 others went to a talk a talk at the AIIA (Brendan Nelson guest speaker) and afterwards i realised how well informed they both were compared to me.

Now things havent really changed when im with them, i still have a ball, but i can't shake this feeling that they might have lost all respect for me.

In their own time they now choose to go to political debates, go on exclusive leadship camps, do internships at parliament house, volunteer for EVERYTHING, get ridiulously sought after scholarships to study overseas... yeahhh

They've all just become so crazy-motivated, and well, for now I just want to be a teenager, bludge through my uni degree and have fun on the side.
I have the whole rest of my life to be serious..right?

We've been friends for years, maybe they were like this all along.

I mean the other night we were at a pub, and all of a sudden all they wanted to talk about was "the decline of small communities" .. I WAS PISSED.. i wanted to have fun. That's not fun for me.

Think it's time for me to move on? Or learn from them? Gah my freaking ego couldn't stand to learn from them. I've always been smart, but now i'm just so far behind.

Is everyone this informed these days?

Help.
 

ur_inner_child

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Why couldnt you have said "come on guys, lets talk about something else, I wanna have fun". I do it here and there, and it doesn't mean I know nothing about the topic.

Plus you don't have to alike to be good friends.
 

Nakashima

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You can just suggest to them that since you're all at the pub, maybe you could take a break from politics and whatnot. Easy peasy.

On the other hand, it won't hurt to let yourself be influenced by them. Nobody said you shouldn't have fun while studying, but if you set such low standards for yourself you'll just end up losing your future job opportunities to people like your friends.
 

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I have some friends like that who have changed so much since they finished school in 2005. I guess it didn't help that I was in school an extra year but whenever I'm around them I get left feeling like I'm really young and immature compared to them.

We just don't have all that much in common anymore, but I guess things like that happen in life. People are changing all the time as they have different experiences, you can't really expect friendships to stay exactly the same as they were in school. It doesn't mean you still can't be good friends and have fun though!
 

chelsea girl

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It's natural to grow apart from your friends once you've left high school. I very, very, very rarely talk to or see my high school friends these days, and instead I have made new groups of friends who share similar interests. It's actually quite sad when people hang onto their childhood friends in adult years because they are afraid of change, and so they only stick to what is familiar and doesn't require them to step out of their comfort zones and expand their social circles.

It's okay to have lots of various friendship groups to cater to different needs; I have my friends whounderstand and can empathise with my personal problems, the ones with the same music tastes who I can go to gigs with, the ones who are good for a bit of silly and immature fun, and the ones who I've known since I was in primary school and have grown up with so are nice to catch up with for sentimental reasons. :)
 

melimoo

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yeah, its a little sad but i've grown up and am now totally different to my old school friends. i've "grown out of" my old best friend, whereas other school friends i've gotten closer with since leaving uni.
its inevitable but don't hang onto something that sliding away. just let it go and embrace your new friends :)
 

SweetSeasons

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Ingoesout said:
What the fuck? So we've been at uni for a year and all of a sudden these holidays i've just realised how different we are.

I didn't really realise until my self and 2 others went to a talk a talk at the AIIA (Brendan Nelson guest speaker) and afterwards i realised how well informed they both were compared to me.

Now things havent really changed when im with them, i still have a ball, but i can't shake this feeling that they might have lost all respect for me.

In their own time they now choose to go to political debates, go on exclusive leadship camps, do internships at parliament house, volunteer for EVERYTHING, get ridiulously sought after scholarships to study overseas... yeahhh

They've all just become so crazy-motivated, and well, for now I just want to be a teenager, bludge through my uni degree and have fun on the side.
I have the whole rest of my life to be serious..right?

We've been friends for years, maybe they were like this all along.

I mean the other night we were at a pub, and all of a sudden all they wanted to talk about was "the decline of small communities" .. I WAS PISSED.. i wanted to have fun. That's not fun for me.

Think it's time for me to move on? Or learn from them? Gah my freaking ego couldn't stand to learn from them. I've always been smart, but now i'm just so far behind.

Is everyone this informed these days?

Help.

gah I hate over opinionated fuck wits.. I say dog them.. uni mates are much better!
 

^CoSMic DoRiS^^

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i have a couple of friends like that and i can be a bit that way myself on a reflective day...i deal with it fine because usually i find the debate interesting and fun...but there are places to leave it behind and just let loose, i agree. when everyone around you is partying and generally being silly and you're stuck with people who want to talk about 'geopolitical influences on bla bla' then leave em to it and go find the fun people ;)
 

withoutaface

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Ingoesout said:
What the fuck? So we've been at uni for a year and all of a sudden these holidays i've just realised how different we are.

I didn't really realise until my self and 2 others went to a talk a talk at the AIIA (Brendan Nelson guest speaker) and afterwards i realised how well informed they both were compared to me.

Now things havent really changed when im with them, i still have a ball, but i can't shake this feeling that they might have lost all respect for me.

In their own time they now choose to go to political debates, go on exclusive leadship camps, do internships at parliament house, volunteer for EVERYTHING, get ridiulously sought after scholarships to study overseas... yeahhh

They've all just become so crazy-motivated, and well, for now I just want to be a teenager, bludge through my uni degree and have fun on the side.
I have the whole rest of my life to be serious..right?

We've been friends for years, maybe they were like this all along.

I mean the other night we were at a pub, and all of a sudden all they wanted to talk about was "the decline of small communities" .. I WAS PISSED.. i wanted to have fun. That's not fun for me.

Think it's time for me to move on? Or learn from them? Gah my freaking ego couldn't stand to learn from them. I've always been smart, but now i'm just so far behind.

Is everyone this informed these days?

Help.
I'm reasonably politically aware but I'd in no sense consider myself mature...
 

Ingoesout

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Hmm no they're not supercilios, it's worse than that!! They are crazy do gooders who want to change the world (for the better).

Ahem, i quote "Rack off, I'm not going to spend that much ($90 estimate) on a concert (tool) when I don't even like them that much. I'd rather donate the money to "hippyfest" (current charity she is working for) they need it more than i do."

Mmm.

Meanwhile I kindof think along the lines of ok, i don't have a mortgage, don't need a car, what the fuck else am I going to spend my money on?

Oh oh oh.. and the other day... on Sunday... they dressed up.. and went to church. The only way i'd dress up and go to church is if i was dressed as satan for a laugh.

But the thing is I can't replace them with my uni friends. Uni friends are just "good time" friends. My school friends take my whinging crap and genuinely care for me (aww, sweet innit?).

Also, leaving them makes me a bad person "sorry, I don't like you, I'm an ignorant conceited twat, and you're just too caring and involved"

/torn.
 
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You don't have to replace them. Just acknowledge and accept the differences :)

Just because they have different goals in life doesn't mean you can't still have fun times and d&m's with them. (as has been said before)
 

AsyLum

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Ingoesout said:
Hmm no they're not supercilios, it's worse than that!! They are crazy do gooders who want to change the world (for the better).

Ahem, i quote "Rack off, I'm not going to spend that much ($90 estimate) on a concert (tool) when I don't even like them that much. I'd rather donate the money to "hippyfest" (current charity she is working for) they need it more than i do."

Mmm.

Meanwhile I kindof think along the lines of ok, i don't have a mortgage, don't need a car, what the fuck else am I going to spend my money on?

Oh oh oh.. and the other day... on Sunday... they dressed up.. and went to church. The only way i'd dress up and go to church is if i was dressed as satan for a laugh.

But the thing is I can't replace them with my uni friends. Uni friends are just "good time" friends. My school friends take my whinging crap and genuinely care for me (aww, sweet innit?).

Also, leaving them makes me a bad person "sorry, I don't like you, I'm an ignorant conceited twat, and you're just too caring and involved"

/torn.
Wait till you realise your friends have houses and mortgages, have long time girlfriends with some engaged, and now 5 years into full time jobs.

THEN talk about feeling childish.
 

Captain Gh3y

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AsyLum said:
Wait till you realise your friends have houses and mortgages, have long time girlfriends with some engaged, and now 5 years into full time jobs.

THEN talk about feeling childish.
Well, chances are when they have houses and mortgages they'll grow out of the phase they're in now. So everything will turn out alright.
 

Ingoesout

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AsyLum said:
Wait till you realise your friends have houses and mortgages, have long time girlfriends with some engaged, and now 5 years into full time jobs.

THEN talk about feeling childish.
...Thankyou for such a helpful post.

That is quite an unjust assumption. Who are you to say I won't have all those things when I so desire them?

Sometimes advice is better than an attack, I posted here as i wanted fresh perspective on the situation, everyone so far has given useful advice for me to take on board (thnx to previous posters btw). So mod, why choose to hate?
 

AsyLum

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Ingoesout said:
...Thankyou for such a helpful post.

That is quite an unjust assumption. Who are you to say I won't have all those things when I so desire them?

Sometimes advice is better than an attack, I posted here as i wanted fresh perspective on the situation, everyone so far has given useful advice for me to take on board (thnx to previous posters btw). So mod, why choose to hate?
What the hell are you on? That was neither an attack, nor an insult, but empathy as I'm in the same boat.

Learn to read.
 

ur_inner_child

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Ingoesout, I think you've misunderstood a fairly friendly post.
 

Ingoesout

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Hhaha oh shit man, i feel like a total fool now. So sorry *cringe*. Excuse my inability to properly decipher the tone of certain posts.. haha but you can see where i was coming from right? Sheesh. Again, sorry. Now where is that blushing smiley when i need it?
 

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glitterfairy said:
You don't have to replace them. Just acknowledge and accept the differences :)
qft. and then make your uni group the 'fun' group that you want

as was said to me in another thread here, you can have different friends for different times :)

AsyLum said:
Wait till you realise your friends have houses and mortgages, have long time girlfriends with some engaged, and now 5 years into full time jobs.

THEN talk about feeling childish.
this hasn't happened for me yet but it will in the near future, i'm dreading it.
 
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ur_inner_child

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It's so the exact opposite for me.

Uni friends = shitty socially incapable christian born again muso nerds.

My older friends are the best.

Every other kind of friend in whatever social circle are so much better than my uni friends.
 

AsyLum

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ur_inner_child said:
It's so the exact opposite for me.

Uni friends = shitty socially incapable christian born again muso nerds.

My older friends are the best.

Every other kind of friend in whatever social circle are so much better than my uni friends.
I dont think my uni friends would ever live up to my old friends' habits/ways but they're a different batch (mostly media geeks who are awesome :D) whilst my old friends were my high school life, drinking, partying, and all that came with youth, but now they're all mature, so its like hmm haha.
 

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