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Would I be shooting myself in the foot if I write about a snail for my creative? (1 Viewer)

porquoispas

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Kinda reminds me of the beginning of animal farm- the part when the animals defeat the humans.. Anyway the idea isn't too bad but it all depends on how you execute it. If you're a natural when it comes to creative writing then go for it but if you, like me suck at it, stick with something less risky.

Btw if you do decide to go with it, refine it first. Simple is better.
 

Glenjamin

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I thought its a great idea for a story. Might be a bit repetitive as the snail keeps getting thrown back. Probably think of different ideas that stop the snail from getting to the house would be better
 

Animals

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black_kat_meow said:
Hmm, well, it might go alright if you do if well, but I doubt it getting in the top band...
But then nobody really gets in the top band now do they?
 

Animals

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black_kat_meow said:
I don't know, lol, but wouldn't you aim for that? I know I am.
I'm pretty sure I can get into the band 5 range, but the near impossibility of attaining a band 6 in standard just puts me off big time.
 

sherylbobbins

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OMG I adore it. Put it this way, as long as the protagonist doesn't die or realise the whole journey was just a dream you will have an advantage over a couple of thousand people lol
 

Animals

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Charity F said:
was this the story you were on about, adam?

800/900 on this? impressive
Yep, but I'm yet to write it. Do you think the idea is any good? Be honest here Char.
 

shakky15

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it is original..

the creative writing section isnt really marked on plot. They like to see description and techniques (ie - its the WAY you tell the story that gets you the marks).. so if you can describe the snails feelings and talk about maybe why he wants to get to the front so bad, then it might sound sophisticated. Throw in some description of the colour and texture of the leaf (maybe it isnt as tasty or colourful as the ones in the front porch) and you can definately go well here..

thats what i think anyway. good luck!

PS - are both advanced and standard students area of study marked together in the HSC or are the candidatures seperated and marked by different markers?
 

shakky15

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Charity F said:
idk adam, so...


i remember watching a short film about pretty much the same thing - it was about this snail who need to cross a major highway at night. he made it, in the end

if you're happy with the idea, i think you could made it work...

just a comment though, from what you're got so far: it's an alright start, but kinda has the 'plodding along from A to B to C, the end' feel to it. maybe you could try starting from the moment when the snail gets thrown away by the man, so have the sensation of flying through the air to start off with.

just a suggestion :)
that would really set you apart. plenty of room for description there.
 

aussie-boy

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i think its an excellent idea...
how can people rant about sophistication and level of childishness
the BOS is not interested in epic journeys - its interested in your ability to communicate narrative elements (plot, character development) with advanced language and language techniques
the best stories are the mundane ones, and usually the ones that happen in less than 5 minutes of real time

just make sure it doesnt get boring.
you need to make the reader feel the burning desire to build a home, to the point where they would cry if the snail died

specifically, id say employ contrasts between the small features of the snail (look up body parts on a bio website) and the greater dream at hand

if you want to beef up the journey a bit, make it a journey of discovery of the petulance of humans who have disdain for little things in the world (the snail in this case)

and dont inflate the persona of the snail - it is not some fairtytale creature with an advanced mind. its a snail! keep its thoughts simple but describe them with complexity
 

aussie-boy

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Animals said:
Well, this is what I've got so far. Let me know what you think.

A new day, a new opportunity.

The snail began its descent from the leaf it had been chewing on and onto the all too familiar pavement to take the journey it knew all too well. After all, it had taken the same journey since the light of day dawned on it, and today was no different to all the other days of its life. It began its trek from the driveway
-you make the familiarity aspect way too blatant

do something like

a snail's breakfast is an invigorating occasion - it marks a new day, a new opportunity
the pavement was cold today - quite a shock for a creature whose slimy ligaments had welcomed the sun-warmed gravel every day for a seeming eternity
its belly relishing from the sharp taste of the chlorophyll stained leaf, the snail began its arduous trek...
 

Pacchiru

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Yazanalsader said:
Thanks for that Char! I did hate the beginning of my story, so yeah, that helps! :D
jeeze.

banned again?

what for this time..?
 

addikaye03

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my story is historically based, but i wana do one on personal journey also. i hope the section III Q is easily adaptable, i wrote an a veryy good essay for it.
 

tommykins

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its original, but remember the markers are 40-50 yr olds (sometimes 30) so write something that can amuse them/relate to them.
 

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